The Kimiko Chronicles 2: Scars
by DeafeningSilence1317
Summary: Remember that one kid, who did that one thing, that one time? The one with the unintentionally emo haircut and the weird eyes? Remember her? Remember how she was killed? Well... What if I told you she wasn't dead? Yes, everyone's favorite little Mary-Sue is back a year after the assassination and she wants a round 2.
1. Chapter 1: Yaoi encounters

Hi there! Good to see you!

I loved the reviews I got for the ending of the Kimiko Chronicles. So much so that I just couldn't wait to make a sequel! Yes, I was planning on a sequel this whole time!

I know this isn't gonna make much sense at first, but believe me. It'll all tie itself together with some time and a little luck... XD This will hopefully have more of a plot than the other one...

Okay, go ahead and read!

I DUN'T OWN. YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT BY NOW.

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><p>3RD PERSON POV!<p>

_Flip flip flip _went the manga book as Konan thumbed through it, a blush crawling across her sweet face.

"So… You like it? You can buy it if you want. It's only 500 yen."

Konan shoved the comic back onto the table and turned away.

"No thank you… Too stimulating…"

Konan grabbed the hand of her sight-impaired companion and hurried off. Tsuneni followed.

"What? What is it?"

"Yaoi manga stand... Got a little sidetracked…"

"Why don't you buy an issue? It's easier for girls to read it because… they don't get boners..."

"You say that like you've actually gotten your hands on a few issues!"

Konan felt the hand in hers twitch ever-so-slightly.

"You know nothing of my ways..."

Konan sweatdropped.

"Where are we going, again?" Tsuneni asked.

"Pein texted me and said we're supposed to meet back up with him in the food court."

"Oh. Why the food court?"

"Well, we gotta eat, Tsu-Tsu."

Tsuneni's stomach growled.

Perfect timing, Tsuneni thought. She sweatdropped.

"I guess… I'm kinda in the mood for some Taco John's myself…"

"How about you, Sweetie? What are you hungry for?" Konan asked. She didn't get a response.

"Kimiko…?"

"… Oh, what? Sorry, it's getting harder to concentrate these days…"

"Maybe once we get your blindfold off we can focus a little more on your attention span."

"Leader-Sama said it's probably… just 'cause I'm still subconsciously trying to remember… stuff…"

Konan squeezed the child's hand.

"You'll remember. Someday, you will."

Kimiko nodded solemnly.

"If not, I'll try to remember something. One of us is gonna remember. One of these days we will," Tsuneni said, placing a hand on Kimiko's shoulder.

The Akatsuki had made the pilgrimage to the mall. It was a nice change from the usual crap they had been dealing with. Kimiko was in Tsuneni and Konan's custody for the time-being. Yes, it might be a bit strange for a child of Kimiko's age to need a guardian to hold her hand and tell her where to go, but she had her reasons.

"Oh, good; you brought the bat," Hidan said teasingly. He was the only one brave enough to crack a blind joke around the Akatsuki's blind female member. Tsuneni slapped him upside the head.

The criminal organization got some lunch and sat down at a table. Pein and Kakuzu had gotten into a very heated debate about Macs and HPs, when Kimiko giggled.

"What? What is so damn important you dare interrupt our debate about computers?" Kakuzu asked. Kimiko tilted her head a little to the left and took a drink of her strawberry milkshake.

"5 tables to the right… 2 dudes are talking dirty to each other… and it's just so funny…"

Everyone's line of sight drifted 5 tables to the right. Sure enough, there were two young men, sitting side by side, whispering things into each other's ears.

"How did you know they were 5 tables to the right?" Kisame asked.

"Why? Are they… really 5 tables to the right?"

There was a sudden group sweatdrop.

Kimiko covered her face with her hands let out a fangirlish squee.

"It's like a real life yaoi manga…"

"Slow it down there; you wouldn't wanna have a fangasm…" Itachi teased.

Kimiko developed several blue depression lines behind her head, and she slumped back in her chair.

"I was only able to fangasm when I could _see_ what was going on…"

The air dropped 20 degrees as the Akatsuki sat in an awkward silence.

"Well, you finished that sentence without pausing like all those other times," Tsuneni said, smiling.

"… Maybe I'm getting better at concentrating…?"

Later that day, the Akatsuki were back at the base. Well, the hideout. Yes, the hideout. The fangirls were gone. It was like Orochimaru had lost all interest in them. It was a little freaky. Pein thought they should take a stand and move back in, because there was no point in being afraid of something that wasn't there anymore.

"Konan? Can I… take my blindfold off?" Kimiko asked.

"No," Konan responded simply.

"Please? I'll sit in my closet… with the light off… Just for a few minutes… That's all I need…"

Konan thought about it.

"Fine; just for a few minutes."

Kimiko got up grabbed onto Rainy's collar. Rainy was her in-home Seeing Eye dog. Out in public, she held onto another Akatsuki member, or rode on someone's back.

They entered her room, and Rainy led her to the closet. She felt around for the accordion door's handle. When she found it, she and Rainy went inside.

"Are the lights off?" Kimiko asked her dog.

"Affirmative."

Kimiko sat down on the floor and took the blindfold off. Every time she removed it, she'd hope she would see something. But her hope was crushed every time. All she ever saw was darkness. No color. Just pure darkness. It was impossibly lonely. She could remember things. She remembered the year she spent with the Akatsuki just fine; except she didn't see images or colors. She remembered with words. It was as if a tiny part of her had written down everything that occurred in her year with the Akatsuki, and someone was reading her what had been written. It infuriated her that she couldn't remember with pictures. She hated words. They limited her mind and imagination. Drawing, pictures, and images weren't limited. They were infinite. They said words that no other language could begin to express; and she couldn't see…

"Kim?"

Kimiko jolted herself out of her thoughts.

"You were gone a while. It's been like, 4 minutes."

"Oh…? It felt a lot shorter than that."

"What goes on in that pretty little head of yours?"

Kimiko turned her head up to the ceiling.

"Do you think in words… or images…?"

Rainy thought for a moment. He scratched behind his ear with his one of his hind legs.

"Well, images, of course."

"Good boy… Good boy…"

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><p>That part with the 'words are limited' thing came from The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian. Well, it was inspired by it anyway. You guys should read it. Hehe, it's a good book.<p>

Anyway, you're probably thinking, KIMIKO IS ALIVE? HOW CAN THIS BE?

Well, your questions will (hopefully) be answered in the coming chapters.

Reviews?

(PS: To fans of 'To Despise A Fangirl', I can't seem to push out any ideas for the coming chapters, so you're gonna have to be patient with me... Again... But don't worry; I won't discontinue it or anything)


	2. Chapter 2: Sharpies and scars

LULZ HI THAR.

It took forever to write this... (_ _|||

And there's not even any explanations in it... XD Just filler, pretty much.

BUT...

I changed the title to 'Scars' for a reason. Hehe...

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><p>3RD PERSON POV!<p>

"Remind me again… why we are doing this?" Kimiko asked.

"Think of it as an identification tag," Hidan replied.

"What color are you using… if I may ask?"

"Silver..."

Kimiko sighed dejectedly.

"I wanted it in purple!"

"Well you're getting silver and you're gonna like it!"

Konan walked in.

"Why are you writing on Kimiko's foot with a sharpie?"

"Reassurance, Konan; reassurance."

Hidan put the cap on the silver sharpie and sat back to admire his art.

"What does it say…?"

"'Property of the Akatsuki'."

Kimiko developed several blue depression lines on the back of her head.

"So… that's all I am to you guys? Property…?"

Hidan sweatdropped.

"I'm gonna be brutally honest. Right now, you're pretty much property."

Konan slapped Hidan upside the head.

"Don't listen to him, Kim… He's retarded…"

"So am I. Is _he_ property like I am?"

"Hon, you have a brain. Hidan doesn't. If anything, he's more of a property object than you are."

Kimiko nodded.

"Now, me and Pein are going on a mission. I'm not gonna put anyone in charge, because that will cause rivalry, and rivalry will cause problems. Problems cause suffering. Suffering causes cravings for revenge. Cravings for revenge are a cause for getting level , and an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."

Kimiko's shoulders drooped.

"That was meant to insult me, wasn't it?"

"Indirectly."

Tsuneni, who was apparently eavesdropping from behind the couch, popped up and smiled.

"Konan, I swear to Jashin that I will keep them under control. Please."

Konan pondered for a second.

"Hmm… Yeah, fine."

Hidan's jaw dropped.

"But… But… Wait! You're only giving her the job because she's a girl!"

Konan raised an eyebrow and grinned maliciously.

"So what if I am?"

Hidan got a tick vein on the back of his head.

"You sexist bitch!"

Pein just happened to be walking by the lounge as the insult escaped Hidan's lips.

A FEW TRAGIC HIDAN BASHING MINUTES LATER…

Hidan was curled up in the corner of the room with a black eye and some bruised pride.

"Well, we're off," Konan said, laying a calming hand on Pein's shoulder. He was still a little fired up from beating the shit out of Hidan.

"Have a safe trip," Tsuneni said, opening the back door for them with her telekinesis. The truth was she couldn't wait for them to leave.

The two ninja, who had stepped out onto the back patio, smiled and disappeared in a flash-step fashion.

"Finally…" Tsuneni said, closing the door and leaning against it. She closed her eyes. She was in charge…

"Tsu-san?"

Tsuneni opened her eyes.

"How'd you know I was sitting here?"

"I could hear you breathing."

Tsuneni stood and ruffled Kimiko's hair.

"You hear a lot of stuff these days."

"It's impossible to sleep… I swear, I can hear mice farting these days…"

Tsuneni laughed.

"Mice don't fart, do they?"

"… That's something you should take up with Google…"

"I don't use Google. I'm a BING person."

"Why BING?"

"Because it's not Google."

"… I see what you did there…"

LATER THAT DAY…

"Hey Kim?"

Kimiko turned her head in the general direction of the voice. The box of apple juice in her hand made a tiny squeak as she took a sip.

"Makoto's coming over to see you."

Spit take on Kimiko's part. Not to mention everyone else in the room who was drinking something.

"… What did you say…?" Kimiko asked slowly.

"Makoto's coming over."

Hidan smacked Tsuneni upside the head.

"No way in Jashinist hell is that gonna happen."

"Shut your mouth Hidan. Just shut your stupid mouth," Tsuneni said, getting a tick vein on the back of her head.

"If I catch hell from him, Tsu-san… you're catching it with me," Kimiko said, placing an elbow on the table and resting her cheek on her fist.

"If you catch hell from him, just tell Hidan and Deidara and we won't have any problems," Tsuneni replied.

"If I tell them… we'll be dealing with a charge on murder… in the 3rd degree…"

"We're right here (un)," Hidan and Deidara said in unison, sharing a sweatdrop.

"I know… I know," Kimiko said, smirking.

"We'd only be pushed to murder if you lost your virginity to him," Hidan said, half joking.

"Who says I'm a virgin?" Kimiko asked, turning her head in Hidan's general direction.

Everyone grew dead silent. A group sweatdrop hung above their heads like a chandelier of awkwardness.

7 seconds of silence later, Kimiko burst out in insane laughter.

"That was cruel, man…" Kisame commented.

Kimiko's laughter halted so abruptly that the temperature in the room dropped 30 degrees.

"I see…" Kimiko said, her head turned off to the side.

Dramatic pause.

"… Everyone in this room is a virgin… which explains why everyone was so quiet…"

With that, everyone in the room simultaneously began shouting their defenses.

Kimiko, now having set a distraction, slipped out with Rainy to the patio. They sat down at the top of the patio stairs.

"So… You actually _want_ to see Makoto again?"

"There's no easy way to answer that…"

Rainy looked up at his master.

"I mean… I'm kind of blind…"

Rainy sweatdropped.

"You know what I mean."

Kimiko laughed.

"Bark for me when you see him coming, m'kay?"

The sight-impaired child lied down on her back and ran a hand threw her semi-longish black hair.

"What color is the sky right now?"

"Oh… It's really cloudy… Should be raining any second now…"

"Yeah, I hear it coming…"

"You can hear that too?"

"Mmhmm…"

The gentle, almost nonexistent wind blew through the trees. The grass surrounding the training field rippled as the wind caressed the ground. The fresh smell of rain tickled Kimiko's nose. The cool wood of the patio deck made Kimiko's lower back throb faintly; probably because she hadn't lied on a flat surface in quite a while.

Rainy raised his head.

"He's coming."

Kimiko sat up.

"That was quick…"

"What are you talking about? It's been half an hour since we came outside."

Kimiko raised her slender eyebrows, although Rainy couldn't see.

"It's been that long?"

"Yeah; I thought you fell asleep. You didn't move that entire time."

"Hehe… I wished it were that easy to fall asleep…"

Kimiko heard Makoto's footsteps in the grass near the staircase landing. She knew his footsteps as well as she knew her own.

"Hey Hoe."

Kimiko smirked.

"Hi, Oto."

Makoto climbed the wooden steps of the patio. A tiny, cold raindrop landed in Kimiko's nose. Makoto stooped down in front of Kimiko and stared at her blindfold.

"So you're really blind?" He asked. Kimiko heard the tightness in his voice. Either he was holding back a sob, or he was about to laugh.

"Uh-huh…" Kimiko replied. She lifted a hand to touch him, but he stopped her by grabbing her wrist.

"I've got a million things I wanna tell you, but first," Makoto whispered as he leaned forward. The two teens kissed passionately, and Rainy thought he saw rose petals and sparkles floating about behind the two lovebirds.

Makoto then gave Kimiko a hug. It was one of those hugs you only see in an anime. There was sad violin music (which contrasted greatly with the rose petals and sparkles which were still floating everywhere), Makoto had his eyes closed as he held Kimiko close, and Kimiko, under her blindfold, had wide eyes filled with tears.

The rain was steadily falling now, and the sound of it pattering against the wooden patio comforted Kimiko. She felt bad. By the way Makoto was breathing, she knew he was crying. She didn't like making people cry.

"You pussy…" Kimiko said, returning the embrace. She placed a delicate hand on the back of Makoto's head.

"I don't think you realize the gravitation of the situation here…" Makoto said, pulling away just enough to look at her.

"I think I do…" Kimiko said. Her bangs began sticking her face from the rain now pounding against her back.

"Girl meets boy… Girl falls in love with boy… Boy falls for a prettier girl… Girl cries… Boy apologizes and goes back to said girl… Girl dies… Boy forgets dead girl… Girl comes back… and now it's the boy who cries…"

Before Makoto could begin contradicting Kimiko's statement, Kimiko grabbed his hand and stood up.

"Let's go inside… I'm soaking…"

Rainy stood and followed the two inside. They kicked off their shoes off, and they went into the kitchen. Kimiko sat down on the island in the middle of the kitchen. Makoto sat down next to her.

"As I was saying," Makoto said, running a hand through his hair. "First off… Hanako was not, is not, and will not ever be prettier than you. Second, I cried because I treated you like crap and out of nowhere you died. Do you know how bad I felt? Not to mention, you kinda died…"

Kimiko laughed with no humor in her tone.

"I'm not gonna correct you… But I'm gonna say this… Remember when I threw a kunai at you… and you got cut?"

Makoto grinned sadly at the memory.

"Yeah…"

"Did it… leave a scar…?"

Makoto was about to nod, but he remembered that his girlfriend was blind.

"No…"

Kimiko laughed again. But it was a sad kind of laugh; not cold. It was just a heartbreaking kind of laugh.

"That's what I was afraid of…"

Makoto squeezed her hand, which he still had a loose grip on. It was his way of asking what she meant.

"I was kinda hoping… it would leave a scar…"

Makoto raised his eyebrow.

"…What…?"

Kimiko snapped out of whatever state of mind she was in, and shook her head.

"Never mind… Never mind…"

She turned toward Makoto, and hugged him. She missed the way he smelled. She missed his voice. She missed him.

"I missed you too…" He said, rubbing her head and putting an arm around her.

He's a mind reader, Kimiko thought.

He put a hand on her cheek and took a long look at her face. Her blindfold was soaked, and he was hoping that it was only wet because of raindrops. It was his turn to cry. She'd already cried herself to sleep so many nights before. He knew it. She knew he knew. They would leave it at that…

"Your boobs are _huge_…"

Guess how many Akatsuki members were eavesdropping at the time. Guess.

Kimiko could only laugh as Makoto was tackled to the floor and beaten senseless by several fuming Akatsuki members.

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><p>ASDFJKL; Kimiko's hot boyfriend comments on Kimiko's boobs. Nice. XDDD<p>

Review? Weeblies? Mer?


	3. Chapter 3: Kimiko's return PART 1

ADURHURHUR. XD Super late.

I know, I know... BUT A FEW OF YOUR QUESTIONS WILL FINALLY BE ANSWERED. This is part one of the 2 part series that explains how Kimiko came back to the Akatsuki after a year of absense. Ahurdur.

I OWN NOTHING.

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><p>3RD PERSON POV!<p>

Hidan had his face pressed up against the plasma flat screen TV, his hands white from gripping the controller so hard. He was still fired up from beating the crap out of Makoto earlier that afternoon, and the video game he was playing certainly wasn't helping.

"Shit, shit, grenade launcher! Oh there's a sniper! SNIPER BEHIND YOU-!" Deidara yelled. Alas, it was too late. Hidan was exploded; then teabagged. Brutally.

"Oh… my… bumblebee goddesses of peanut butter country… HE FUCKING TEABAGGED ME," Hidan yelled, throwing the controller across the room and burying his head in his hands.

Deidara smirked at Hidan's rage.

"I swear… I'm gonna find that guy, and put my boot up his ass!" Hidan declared.

"You don't even have boots, Hidan," Kimiko commented. She was seated on the couch behind the two zealous gamers with a juice box in her hands.

"Right up his ass!" Hidan continued, a tick-vein throbbing on the back of his head.

"Chill out, man," Deidara said, smoothing his blond bangs back.

"Ass!"

Kimiko sweatdropped.

"You got that from YouTube…"

Hidan sighed as though he were about to tell a sad story; which he was.

"Kim… I didn't think I'd have to tell you this… But…" Hidan sighed again. "This asshole sniper guy asked me where you were for all this time… Seeing as you haven't been able to play… And I said she was dead… So he said he was happy and she could go to whoretard hell… So I sniped him…"

Kimiko sat there. She sat for a good 10 seconds.

"So?"

"He then insulted your gamertag, _PurplePedobear,_ by saying that purple was a retarded color."

Kimiko's fingers tapped against the juice box in a disturbingly fast rhythm. She slowly set her juice box down, ending the tapping. But the tune still rang in Hidan and Deidara's ears.

"The fires of whoretard hell have no fury like mine…" She whispered. To emphasize her epic anger, blue fire enveloped her. Had she not been wearing her blindfold, the two gamers would have seen that her eyes were glowing white with rage.

"That's my girl," Hidan said, placing a hand on her head.

The pleasant sound of rain dripping against the roof could be heard by Kimiko, and only Kimiko. No one else seemed to hear what she heard. It got creepy at times, but she was okay with it. Just a perk of being blind, perhaps…

"Let's take a break, shall we, hn?" Deidara asked, switching off the console.

Tsuneni poked her head into the room. She locked her green gaze onto Hidan. Her face was red, and she looked somewhat determined to get something done.

"H-Hidan? Could we… talk for a second?"

Hidan looked up. Kimiko, now calmed down, developed a question mark above her head. Something in Tsuneni's tone… It was a tone never before heard from Tsuneni; shyness.

"Sure, I guess."

Tsuneni stepped into the room.

"Uh, _alone_."

Deidara and Kimiko didn't need to be told twice.

"How about we go eat some lunch, huh Kim?" Deidara asked, grabbing Kimiko's hand and rushing out of the room.

Tsuneni stood there awkwardly for a moment. She had just been sitting in her room for 2 whole hours, trying to convince herself to do it.

"Uh… I was just wondering… Um…"

Hidan was standing there just about as awkwardly.

"… You better spit it out or we'll end up creating another Justin Bieber," Hidan said.

JUST DO IT, her mind screamed. But the moment her eyes met his beautiful purple ones, she lost all resolve.

"I… uh… N-never mind!" Tsuneni said, dashing from the room. Her face was redder than ever.

"Heh… Okay then…" Hidan said, shrugging. He sat down on the couch and flicked through the channels. He settled for watching Family Guy.

WITH THE BLIND IDIOT AND THE ARTSY IDIOT…

"It's been raining a lot lately, hasn't it?" Deidara asked, looking out of the kitchen window.

Kimiko's legs swung freely off of the kitchen counter Deidara had lifted her onto a moment ago. She brushed a stray strand of black hair behind her ear. It fell back into it's original place a moment later, but she didn't really notice. Her tongue made circles around the plastic straw in between her lips, as another squirt of juice hit against the roof of her mouth.

She wanted so badly to see outside…

"I've been hearing a lot of it… Do you think… it'll start flooding soon?"

"Well, it'll be a nice change, seeing as how dry it was earlier this year…"

"Yeah… I just hope no one drowns…"

Deidara shot her a WTF WHO ARE YOU look, but she didn't see.

"I mean… I wouldn't be able to see them disappearing… beneath the cold surface of the water… screaming for help… yet none will come fast enough…" She added, a malicious grin gracing her features.

Deidara let out a sigh. There was the Kimiko he knew…

Kisame walked in.

"Hi, Kisa-san!" Kimiko said cheerily. Her malicious grin turned into a sweet grin within the blink of an eye.

Kisame froze in the doorway.

"How…?"

"I… recognized your footsteps," Kimiko said. She sweatdropped.

"Is that creepy?"

"Not at all, Kim… Not at all…"

LATER THAT DAY…

The Akatsuki were gathered in the lounge room, watching a scary movie. Well, almost all the Akatsuki. Pein and Konan had left that morning on their mission, and the only reason Kimiko was even in the lounge room with the others was because she didn't like being alone in the dark during a rainstorm.

The scary movie they were watching, you ask?

Justin Bieber's movie; Never Say Never.

Of course, the power had to go out about 20 minutes into the movie.

"His screeching is still ringing in my ears…" Itachi said, shivering.

Kisame was apparently the only one who

The Akatsuki groped around for their cell phones, or any other source of light.

"The iPhone has a flashlight app, if that's any help," Kimiko droned. Same old darkness…

Now, the Akatsuki had a pretty damn good treasurer, because they were all able to afford iPhones. The next few minutes of their time was devoted to installing flashlight apps into their phones.

There was a scratching sound that rang out as the apps were being installed. Everyone whipped their heads around, looking for the source of the noise. Kimiko was way ahead of them, however.

"It came from down the hall…"

Hidan was the first to poke his head out of the safety of the lounge room. He turned on his flashlight app. His first thought was Kagura the moose. His second thought was the mouspiders.

But nothing like that happened. Instead, Ghost came running out of the darkness with his pupils dilated, and his puffy tail whipping about. He always got riled up during thunderstorms.

He ran right past Hidan and took a flying leap at Kimiko. Since he was such a large cat, and Kimiko having the reflexes of a drunken raccoon, had little time to react as she went crashing to the floor.

"Holy sweet zombie Jesus- WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, GHOST?" She yelled, shoving the large black cat off of her.

"TROLL IN THE DUNGEON, TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!" He shrieked, bouncing up and down anxiously.

"What are you going on about?" She asked, rubbing the back of her sore head. It hadn't collided with anything; but she was beginning to think blood was drawn, as she could feel something wet on her fingers.

"I have no idea… Hehe…" Ghost sat down, and grinned like that of the Cheshire cat. He licked his paw and rubbed it around on his face to clean himself.

"You didn't dig into the catnip again, did you?" Kimiko asked.

"I MISS SUNNY," He blurted, his excited demeanor returning. The only excuse for breaking out the catnip would be grief, wouldn't it?

"Suck it up and grow a pair, man…" Kimiko said, wincing at the stinging sensation at the back of her skull.

Ghost walked out of the room with as much dignity as he could muster, before breaking down in the hallway. He wailed the way only cats can wail, and a chibi cloud of depression hung just outside the lounge doorway.

"What did I just say?" Kimiko yelled. The wails were reduced to tiny kitten mews.

Everyone had watched the event in minor horror. Kimiko turned and smiled sweetly.

"He's such a sensitive cat," Kimiko said with a smile that could make Gin Ichimaru roll over in his grave. "Am I bleeding?" She asked a few moments later, touching the back of her head and holding out her hand for the Akatsuki to examine; which defeated the purpose of her previous statement.

"I'll help you clean that up," Tsuneni said, standing up. She removed Kimiko's hands which were covering the wound, and got to work.

Being a veteran Mary Sue, she had somewhat whimsical healing abilities. She held a glowing green hand up to the back of Kimiko's head and applied pressure.

"Did you slice your head open on something? Good God, Kimiko…" Tsuneni nagged as she healed. Kimiko sweatdropped.

"You saw it… I just hit the floor… I didn't hit anything…"

"Was it the cat then? Are his claws that sharp?"

"No… He didn't go anywhere near my head."

"Well what cut you're head open?" Tsuneni asked, looking around the area near Kimiko.

"… I have no fuckin' idea, Tsu-san..."

Tsuneni was about to snap at Kimiko for cursing at her, but she noticed something.

"That's what it is… You have a scar on the back of your head. It reopened," Tsuneni said. She'd seen too many cases of scars not quite healing up. She was an ex-anbu captain after all.

Kimiko, under her blindfold, furrowed her slim eyebrows together. She didn't remember ever getting cut on the back of her head that badly before.

"How recent?"

"I'm not a forensic scientist, you know," Tsuneni said, placing her hands on her hips. "It's probably gonna need stitches…"

Kimiko straightened abruptly. Stitches never sat well with her.

"C'mon; we need to do this in the bathroom. It could get messy," Tsuneni said, dragging Kimiko out of the room by light of iPhone.

The two made their way to the nearest bathroom.

"Can't you just like… heal it up or something?" Kimiko asked, her voice at least 4 octaves higher than normal.

"No, it won't heal properly unless we stitch it up. Don't worry; it doesn't hurt as much as you think."

When the two had made it into the bathroom, Tsuneni leant down and opened the cabinet under the sink. She grabbed the first-aid kit and set it down on the sink. When she found the stitching set, she got to work.

Kimiko showed no visible pain. She sat with a straight face. A poker face.

That's when Tsuneni thought of something. She thought a thought she'd been thinking for a long time; something she'd been meaning to ask her blind friend for a while.

"Do you remember when we found you?" She asked.

"Yeah... It's a bit hazy, though."

"Would you mind refreshing my memory?" Tsuneni asked, not even taking her eyes off her work.

"Well… It all started with a sound…"

_A sweet, high-pitched whistle echoed in the distance. The trees whispered words in an unknown language. Somewhere, a cricket chirped like an asshole._

_Kimiko's lips moved. Her chapped, dry lips silently breathed something. A sorrowful, almost unsettling tune seemed to play along with her words._

"_Anata no eien no ie…" (1)_

_The tune drifted away. She forgot it as soon as she spoke those words._

_Her back ached. Her ribs burned. Her stomach felt hollow. Her limbs were heavy. She could smell blood and sweat on her. The bitter tang of blood rested on her dry tongue. Her head hurt. She brought a shaking hand to her face. Her fingertips came across a smooth, warm fabric. _

_She brought her other hand to the back of her head. She found a knot of the same fabric. _

_Was she wearing a blindfold?_

_She reached behind her and took the blindfold off._

_Darkness was all that she could see; pure, inky blackness._

_She placed 3 delicate fingers above her eye and opened them as far as she could. She felt her fingers on her eyelids. She knew they were open because they stung from the wind blowing through the trees._

Am I blind?

_She couldn't remember much. The last thing she could really remember at all was…_

"KIMIKO!"

_Then… darkness… That's when the darkness came…_

_With that thought, the rest of the memories came back. The Akatsuki, the base, Makoto, the mouspiders, Kazuki…_

_Only a year's worth of memories. That was all. Nothing about her 4__th__ birthday, nothing about the village she came from… nothing of her life before the Akatsuki…_

_The Akatsuki…_

_Where was she? A forest? That could be anywhere…_

_She had shifted too far in her seat. She went plummeting to the ground._

_She had been sitting in a tree!_

"_Ow…" She groaned. Her voice was more scratchy and high-pitched than she recalled._

"_Kimiko…?"_

_She straightened. She knew that voice. She felt her head begin to hurt; more intense this time. But she needed to get a word out. She needed to get that one word out._

"_Leader-Sama…?"_

"_KIMIKO!"_

_It wasn't in her head this time. It wasn't that feminine voice in her head. It was Leader-Sama's voice. Not the voice of Tsuneni. Somewhere through that dark haze of memories, she felt something. She felt a hand on her shoulder. This hand felt… familiar. It was a gentle, loving hand. For some reason, gentle and loving touch felt like such a faraway feeling. But she could learn to love it again._

* * *

><p>(1): 'Your eternal home' in Japanese. According to Google. XD<p>

Alright. The next part will be in the next chapter. I love leaving you guys with cliffhangers... Hehe...

And fans of To Despise A Fangirl. I. AM. TRYING. X'D I promise, if I can't pump out a chapter for this or Seminole Winds Have No Name, I'll get to work on the next chapter. LoLz.

Reviews? Pwease? Mer?


	4. Chapter 4: Kimiko's return PART 2!

-comes dashing into view wearing pajamas and hair looking like crap- I. AM. SO. EFFING. LATE. XD This was supposed to be out like, last week. But I was like,

"I SHOULD MAKE IT LONGER,"

So it just sat in my computer for a week. Because I really couldn't add anything more to this chapter than what I had planned. XD

So, here you go. Sorry it isn't longer but I have a REALLY epic one planned after this one. I have more time to get on the computer now, so I'll TRY, TRY, TRY, to have it at least DONE by next week. You might see it up by next weekend. Possibly sooner. If I don't get it out by next weekend, I PROMISE, I'll have the new chapter for To Despise A Fangirl out. That one's almost done. XD

Okay, go and read. GO GO GO!

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><p>"<em>You seriously can't remember anything <em>else_?"_

_Kimiko shook her head almost robotically. She was more interested in something rather creepy; the smell of the hideout. She wasn't aware from when she first came to live with the Akatsuki, and she wondered why she was just noticing it. The hideout smelled like wet stone, new carpets, and tea. Really a comforting smell._

"_God my face hurts…" She sighed, her head dropping the table. Her voice was a little raspier than the Akatsuki remembered, but perhaps that was what happened when you hadn't heard a voice in almost a year._

"_Let me take a look," offered Hidan. Kimiko lifted her head and turned herself in Hidan's general direction._

"_Well you don't have any bruises…" He said, sitting back. His chair made a miniscule creaking sound that Kimiko reacted to by pausing a moment. She was still getting used to her newfound hearing-enhancement._

"_It's kinda in the eyebrow area…" She said absently, running her fingers over her eyebrows. "Maybe it's like… eyebrow cancer…"_

"_Like that even exists," Tsuneni said, rolling her eyes (which were still red and a little puffy). She could sure lay on the sarcasm for someone who just finished crying over Kimiko's return._

"_Don't even start, Tsuneni," Konan said, rubbing her temples._

"… _So I'm guessing a lot has happened since I left…" Kimiko started, crossing her arms on the table. She kept her ruined gaze down to the table so no one would have to look at her cloudy, faded eyes. "Tell me… Did someone finally hit Justin Bieber with a bus?"_

"_No, sadly…" was the answer. Kimiko felt her a dramatic shift in her breathing, and she assumed she just had something like a heart palpitation._

"_You're not a fan anymore?" Kimiko asked._

"_No. There's just no more spark when he sings. He was getting ugly anyway."_

_Things really change in a year, Kimiko thought. Kisame was such a big fan of Justin Beaver before I left… (1)_

"_Hey Sasori…"_

_Sasori looked over to the sight-impaired 13 year old._

"_Hm?"_

"… _Nothing…"_

_There was an awkward silence in which Kimiko swore she heard a gay baby's first breath a few miles away._

"… _Does Itachi still speak in monotone?"_

"_No."_

"_Itachi, replying to a question meant for someone else _in monotone_ has got to be the ultimate irony."_

"You remember all _that_?" Tsuneni asked, finishing up her stitching.

Kimiko shrugged. Tsuneni placed a bandage over the stitches to keep them from getting infected.

"Alright, don't sweat, don't shower, don't touch it, don't make your heart rate spike suddenly, and don't make overly-exaggerated muscle movements that involve your head until they heal up a little, got that?" Tsuneni chided, grabbing Kimiko's hand and dragging her out of the room.

Tsuneni wanted the previous storytelling session to end differently; with her saying "You left out the part where I had to watch everyone's heart break a little bit, and just when the cracks were healing you came back and they just fell apart all over again; and I can't stitch a heart back together like I did to your stupid head."

She wanted to say that. She was sure Kimiko knew that already, though. Kimiko was that kind of person; she could sense the mood. She understood things that Tsuneni didn't. Tsuneni was confident that Kimiko's blindness only made her ability to listen and sense things all the more keen.

Tsuneni could only come to one conclusion as she felt Kimiko's cold hand in her own.

Kimiko was alive because someone knew how to bring back the dead; and they needed answers.

* * *

><p><em>(1): Yes that was Kisame replying to her. Why do you appear so surprised? XD<em>

Yup. Failed last sentence. Fail chapter is fail. XD But yeah. I'll try to get an update out for at least ONE story (Seminole Winds, this, or To Despise A Fangirl) each week. Either that, or a one-shot. I TAKE REQUESTS, IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT! XD I want to get a really heavy traffic to make up for my horrible writing. Like that's a good goal, but it's MY GOAL. XD

Reviews. NAO. I COMMAND YOU.


	5. Chapter 5: The basement PART 1

FAKJ;OIN; KIMIKO'S BIRTHDAY, TOBI'S BIRTHDAY, AND CHRISTMAS HAVE PASSED. ; A ; OH DEAR GOD.

Anyways, I figure I'll get this out of the way so I can get to work on those... events... I mentioned above. Happy (late, coughcough) belated 14th birthday to Kimiko Reitogawa, and Happy birthday to Tobi; who must be like, 150 by now. XD

I OWN NOTHING. 8'D

* * *

><p>Tsuneni sat Kimiko down on the couch and everyone lounged about quietly, tapping away on their iphones. Kisame texted Konan the situation, and Kakuzu skype'd Pein to ask him how they should proceed.<p>

"As leader of all you idiots, I'd suggest that someone check the breaker box in the basement."

"But… It smells like mouspiders and cow poop down there."

Everyone sweatdropped at Zetsu, who ducked down in his flower pot in the corner. (1)

"Alright… Itachi, you and Deidara go down and check."

Itachi raised an eyebrow.

"Why _us_?"

"You juniors need to _learn_."

Kimiko giggled.

Itachi and Deidara begrudgingly trudged out of the room to the basement.

"Hey Kakuzu, if the power's out… How can I see you?"

Kakuzu sweatdropped as if it were a stupid question.

"Kisame is… pointing his… flashlight… at me."

"Ah."

"Well, we'll call you back if something else goes wrong."

Pein rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"I'm _aquiver_ with anticipation." (2)

Kakuzu hit 'end call' and sat back.

"I have a feeling he won't be quivering very long…"

MEANWHILE…

Deidara wrinkled his nose in disdain at the smell that hit him. Itachi however didn't even flinch.

"You'd think that Zetsu would at least clean up after himself, hn…"

"Yeah, but he's stupid like that…"

There were two flights of stairs. One lead approximately 10 or 20 feet down, and there was a place where you had to turn to go down another flight (still 10 or 20 feet long), then you turned again down about 5 stairs. The breaker box would be where the second and third set of stairs connected.

While Itachi tinkered with the breaker box, Deidara stood there, hugging himself and holding up his iPhone's flashlight beam. That's when he heard the noise.

It was like someone slowly, painfully trudging through waist-high water.

He quickly shined the light around the basement, much to the annoyance of his Uchiha partner.

"What's wrong, Deidara?" Itachi asked with an annoyed tone, waiting for the beam of light to shine back onto his work.

Deidara slowly brought the beam back, shaking his head.

"Nothin'… hn…"

Itachi went on working on the breaker box for a good 20 seconds, and the sound wasn't there.

But it happened again. This time, louder; closer this time.

Deidara quickly snapped his head and flashlight beam to the direction of the noise.

That's when he noticed.

The floor was covered in water! Wet, most likely cold, somewhat murky water.

"Itachi, look at the ground…"

Itachi turned around with a groan of impatience. He surveyed the scene with eyebrows raised.

"Well that can't be good…"

"You think, hn?" Deidara said, sweatdropping.

"You should go down and check to see if it rises. I'm almost done here," Itachi said, pointing to the bottom step; where he expected to see Deidara standing in the next few moments.

Deidara sauntered down the steps to the water's edge (which would be the second to last step) and stared at it while resting back on his haunches.

It didn't seem to be rising… Maybe it was just a broken pipe or something and it would go down…?

"It's not moving, Itachi."

"Hey, weren't you on the second to last step a minute ago?"

Deidara looked around. He had backed up a step. The step he was sitting on was almost consumed with water.

"Was I zoning out that long, hn…?"

"Well, it'd be safer if we waited to turn the lights back on until that water went down or something…" Itachi said, shutting the cute little gray door on the breaker box with a miniscule squeak.

"Good thinking…" Deidara said, standing and running up the steps to the top. Itachi waited for Deidara to open the door a few steps back.

Deidara, thinking the door would open easily, pulled slightly. But the door didn't move. So he pulled harder; and harder, and harder, and harder still. It wouldn't open.

"Ehehehe… Uh, Itachi… Could you possibly pull the door open, hn…?"

Itachi sighed and gently pushed Deidara aside.

"Stand back, _Junior_, and learn from the master."

Deidara rolled his pale blue eyes.

Itachi, after 2 minutes or so of failing horribly, backed up in defeat. Not even 3 seconds later, the doorknob dropped to the floor, sealing their fate.

"I think we better start calling for help now, hn…"

Itachi nodded crestfallenly, and the two commenced in banging on the door and yelling.

MEANWHILE…

Kimiko's ears pricked. She could hear… banging…. And… was that _Itachi _and _Deidara_… yelling?

"Hey, uh… I think… someone should go check on… Dei-san and 'tachi-san..."

"What makes you say that?" Hidan asked, looking up from his game of Angry Birds.

"Just a feeling."

Kisame and Kakuzu decided to take a look, so they stood and left the room.

"Hey Tsu-san…?"

"Hm?"

"I'm gonna ask you something… And I want the _honest_ answer."

Tsuneni raised an eyebrow and sat forward, prepared for the child's question.

"What color are my nails painted?" Kimiko asked, twisting a strand of black hair in her fingers and spreading out her fingers as if to look at her nails, although she couldn't see them.

"Why do you ask?"

"Kona-san told me that she painted them white… But I don't think she was telling the truth..."

"Well you thought right; they're baby pink."

Kimiko sighed dejectedly and sat back.

"Could you paint them light blue for me… Tonight, possibly?"

Tsuneni smiled.

"Alright; when the power comes back, okay?"

Kimiko nodded and relaxed against the couch again.

"Hey Kim?" Hidan asked after a moment of silence.

"Yeah?"

"I saw this thing on NOVA the other day… Can you like, _see_ stuff when you walk?"

Kimiko turned her head ever-so-slightly to the side.

"Que?" (3)

"Okay, so they took this guy. He was blind too, but at one point he could see, I guess. They said he lost his sight after hitting his head really hard or something.

"Anyway, they had him walk down this hallway with like, random shit on the floor. He could like, _see_ the items and move to avoid them, even though he was _blind_ and no one was guiding him. They said it's like, because the brain still registers objects just enough for the person to know they're there."

"Well… I haven't tried it... Like, with my blindfold off, anyway. But… I kinda get that feeling of my forehead tingling… like, right before I run into something… So I guess I have something like that…"

"Didn't they also say some blind people have some kind of echo-location that helps them see like a bat?"

Hidan laughed that kind of laugh where you knew he was preparing to make all kinds of jokes about what was just said.

"They said that's only for people who were _born_ blind, Sasori," Tsuneni said. She watched Hidan with annoyance, as you could see he was just busting to start wise-cracking.

"Hidan, I swear to Jashin; you make a bat joke and I'm going to rip your balls off."

"You ruin all the fun," He said, sighing.

"Closest thing he'll get to getting laid," Sasori muttered to Kimiko. She giggled.

"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!"

Everyone looked to Kimiko, who they expected to see sprawled on the floor over an overturned couch. Well, Tsuneni wasn't aware of that, but she looked at Kimiko anyway just because everyone else was.

Said child was sitting there calmly chewing on her thumbnail, despite the pink nail polish coating it.

"Kimi-san?"

She looked in Tobi's general direction, resting her thumb on her bottom lip.

"Why don't you get scared anymore when Tobi yells?"

Kimiko's head turned in the opposite direction very slowly. She then began rolling her head to pop her neck. She was beginning to do creepy, unusual things while she thought. It must be a substitute for looking around nervously, which she often did when thinking deeply.

"Maybe I'm used to it…?" she concluded weakly, shrugging and going back to chewing her nail.

Tsuneni blinked. Hidan crossed his feet at the ankles and set his head back. Sasori twisted his ring around on his finger. Tobi sat down on the floor and stared from Tsuneni to Kimiko as if summing the two up. Zetsu, still sitting in his flower pot, began a quiet, serious conversation with himself. (4)

Kimiko's ears pricked again. She heard… more banging…? Was that what it was?

* * *

><p>(1): DKFJDAGJE;ROAJ; D'AAAWWWWWW… 8'D Can't you just picture that happening? With like, a chibi Zetsu?<p>

(2): The Hobbit reference, anyone? XD

(3): That's how I ask people to explain further. XD Don't judge.

(4): XDDD God that cracks me up still… Can't you just see like, a little pink flower sprouting out of his head and he's trying to be like, serious? XD

8'D Yup, I did it. I made a 3 part triology chapter. This was back when I thought I had time on my side, but... Oh well, you guys won't mind, will you? So anyway, this'll have 3 parts. Maybe 4 if I'm stupid enough. Then we can slip into birthday and Christmas chappies. :3

Reviews please, my little puppies. 8'D


	6. Chapter 6: The basement PART 2

Finished this in a matter of... 4 days. XD

* * *

><p>"Why did you close the door? Why?" Itachi asked a bewildered Kisame and Kakuzu.<p>

"What do you mean?"

Deidara shoved past the two seniors and the steaming Uchiha to point out that the door handle had broke, and the door was apparently stuck.

"Have you guys tried, like, busting it open with chakra?" Kisame asked. The two juniors sweatdropped.

Itachi thought perhaps a simple power punch would work, so he concentrated, and with a quick motion, smashed his knuckles into the heavy door.

It didn't even budge. Itachi saw the damage before he felt it, Thank Jashin…

"Fuck," He cursed, waiting for his possibly broken knuckles to begin throbbing. A wave of stinging, aching pain hit him a moment later and he hissed.

"Why didn't that work, hn?" Deidara asked, his eyebrows conveying his confusion.

"Lemme have a go at it," Kakuzu said, gently pushing aside the injured Itachi and getting into a battle stance.

He kicked the door with all his might. Well, without chakra, that is.

"What the-? My chakra isn't working!" He whined, setting down his sore foot and placing his hands on his hips.

"My turn," Kisame said, stepping up. Kakuzu raised his hands and backed away. If anything, Kisame was the man for the job.

Kisame paused for only a moment before throwing his punch. To everyone's horror, he hadn't even made a dent.

"What the fuck is this?" Kisame asked, looking down at his hands. His chakra wasn't working either!

"Something must be up with this room," Deidara said more to himself than anyone else. If they're chakra wasn't working, and they couldn't even break the door down using their own sheer strength, how would they get out?

"That water's gonna rise. It's gonna rise and touch the fuse box… Then it'll be like a lake of liquid lightning," Itachi said quietly.

"That's a very poetic way to put our deaths," Kakuzu said, sitting down and sighing. The water had half-consumed the bottom steps. They had maybe a good hour before the water touched the fuse box. Then maybe, if they all sat on the top steps, they'd have a good 2 or 3 hours more. Then what?

MEANWHILE IN ANOTHER… SCENE, IF THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE CALLED…

"Kisame and Kakuzu have been gone awhile," Tsuneni commented. She glared expectantly at Sasori and Hidan.

"What?" Hidan asked, noticing said 18 year old girl staring at him. Sasori stared back at Tsuneni questioningly.

"Aren't you going to go see what they're doing?"

"Why don't you two do it? 'Ladies first', right?"

"Just go do it; Konan left me in charge and you have to listen to whatever I say."

Hidan glanced at Sasori. The two didn't really feel like arguing with Tsuneni anyway. They both stood and went to check.

"Idiots," Tsuneni mumbled.

Kimiko sat there next to Tsuneni. Being the blind little thing she is, she had no way to entertain herself except pick little tangles out of her hair, quietly stroke Rainy, and listen.

There was the banging again…

MEANWHILE WITH THE IDIOTS TRAPPED IN THE BASEMENT…

"That… That was just _stupid_," Kakuzu said, rubbing his temples and sighing heavily. Itachi was frozen in devastation, staring at the closed door behind Sasori and Hidan. Deidara was already banging and yelling on said door again. He was rather persistent and determined to leave.

"You haven't tried any chakra attacks, have you?" Hidan asked, annoyed.

"Chakra doesn't work down here," Kisame said, leaning up against the wall and staring up at the dark ceiling.

"Well that's just _shit_," Hidan said, sitting down. Sasori did the same a moment later.

"Alright, alright… Tsuneni, Kimiko, Tobi, and Zetsu are still out there. Maybe they'll start getting suspicious and come looking for us. We just have to be ready to catch the door when they open it this time," Kakuzu rationalized, glaring at Hidan and Sasori for the last part.

Everything was silent for a while. The only sound was the water and water was floating in it.

"You know what we could do?" Sasori asked the group. Everyone looked at him expectantly.

"We could try to find where the water's coming from and maybe plug it. It would at least slow down the leak a little and give us more time," he suggested.

"I like the way you think, puppet boy," Hidan said, standing up and smiling.

"Hidan, you better do it. If you don't make it back here by the time the water reaches the fuse box, then at least you'll still be alive."

Hidan nodded knowingly and treaded down to the water. It had the better half of the bottom steps. He stepped into the water, which was ice-cold.

"Fucking-ice-cold," he said slowly, high-stepping a couple times to gain some balance and composure.

He spent 10 minutes wading around in the water, searching for the source of the leak. He checked the water pipes for any breakage, but nothing was noticeably wrong. He checked for any large leaks in the ceiling; nothing incriminating there either. Where was this water coming from?

"Hidan, the water's getting a little high," Deidara warned. The water was now covering the bottom steps. If the water got into any gaps in the rubbery cord surrounding the little electrical wires inside, it would result in the water getting an electric charge.

"Well shit," Hidan muttered. He turned quickly and splashed through the water to the stairs. Not a second too soon; just as he left the water, a tiny spark and sizzling was heard. The water seemed to glow for maybe a second or two. Hidan, being the idiot he is, decided to throw something into the water to test it. He took off one of his shoes and tossed it out as far as he could. It sizzled and sparked, then sank.

"That's not good," Sasori said, sweatdropping.

MEANWHILE, IN ANOTHER SCENE…

"You don't suppose they turned the power back on in like, Hidan's room and are just sitting in there playing MW3?" Tsuneni asked.

"If they did… Wouldn't we hear the sound of Deidara losing…?"

Tsuneni nodded.

"I'll go check on them; stay here."

Kimiko nodded and listened to Tsuneni's exiting footsteps.

Tsuneni stomped to the basement door and made up her mind about putting her foot down as the disciplinary and leader figure while Pein and Konan were gone. She flung the door open, and slammed it behind her without a thought.

Everyone in the basement either sat with jaw hanging open in utter devastation, or screaming in rage or sorrow.

"What? What is it?" She shouted over everyone's moaning and whining.

"The door… The door won't open from the inside… and chakra doesn't work down here…"

"Well that's stupid," she said, leaning against the door for a moment before taking a seat next to Hidan.

About a minute or two later of bleak silence, they heard something. The door! It opened! Wait no, it closed already… Oh, hey Kimiko…

Someone had either flung Kimiko in, or she's just a really good actress. But she would've had a pretty nasty fall had Deidara not reached out and caught her by the back of her shirt.

"Kimi-! What the…?"

Kimiko took a few moments to register she wasn't dead, and quickly scrambled to get herself on level ground. Deidara set her on the steps below her and she staggered for a moment before gaining her balance and finally sitting slowly down.

"What _happened_?" Tsuneni asked, reaching forward and grabbing Kimiko's shoulder.

"… I don't… I don't know… I was waiting in the lounge, and… something grabbed me! I couldn't scream because they… They were pressing one of those rags that smell funny into my face… and they just threw me in here," she said, taking a big breath at the end of her explanation and turning her head up to the ceiling, both hands pushing her hair back.

"Well at least we know someone's _trying_ to get us killed…"

Kimiko, had she been a dog or a cat, would've had ears pricked and erect by then. She could hear a persistent, yet quiet gushing sound; like cool water running out of a garden hose. Her nose tickled with the scent of water. However the hell she knew what water smelled like, she'll never know. But it was there.

"I'm gonna take a wild stab in the dark here… Is there a large body of… _water_ in here somewhere…?"

A few eyebrows raised from the wary Akatsuki.

"Yeah, there's water up to the 3 step of the second flight. How'd you know?"

"I can hear it leaking out of somewhere… and I can smell it…"

Everyone who had been there for the scene with Hidan searching for the leak let their eyes light up with possibility.

"Whereabouts?"

Kimiko pointed to one of the far ends of the basement; near the ceiling of the right-hand corner. Everyone squinted in the darkness to see.

"How did we not _hear that_?" Hidan asked himself.

"It's really quiet… I barely heard it myself…," Kimiko said, shrugging.

"How are we gonna get out of here?" groaned Itachi with his broken knuckles.

There was an uncomfortable silence for maybe 4 minutes.

Then, something miraculous happened.

"I have an idea."

Kimiko crawled on all fours up to the heavy door and started shouting for Rainy. It was such a strange thing; hearing Kimiko's voice louder than 2 decibels for once. Sure, she was kinda loud once in a while the year before. But whatever happened in that course of a year changed her demeanor and they were back to square one.

After about 30 seconds, they heard what was probably Rainy come trotting down the hall and scratching at the door.

Everyone shared such a massive sweatdrop it probably held more gallons than the water that was currently flooding the basement.

"Why didn't he hear _us_ when _we_ yelled?" Kakuzu asked finally.

"He doesn't like any of you," Kimiko replied over her shoulder.

"Rainy? You there?"

They heard a bark.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, go get Zetsu."

Another bark and a whimper.

"He won't bite, don't worry."

Bark-bark.

"He's in the lounge."

Bark-bark-bark…?

"He's that big green thing in the flower pot."

They heard the dog trot away.

Kimiko sat back and brushed her bangs out of the way, only to have them fall back into place a moment later. She didn't care though.

"Well that was easy…"

There was another sizzling sound; then, a loud buzz. That's when the lake of liquid lightning glowed blue. It reached the fuse box. The water started gushing out of the hose a little faster.

"Zetsu better haul ass over here or we're gonna have a problem…"

* * *

><p>Alright. I'm tired. So ya'lls can blame my rushed-ness on that. XD A review would be nice. Not much. Just a review. You can just spaz on your keyboard and put a UPDATE SOON PLZ at the end or something. I just like getting reviews. XD<p> 


	7. Chapter 7: The basement PART 3!

I AM HORRIBLE AT UPDATING. /facepalm

This was actually done a long time ago, but I was thinking about completely changing the storyline for like a week, and I ultimately decided that I was too lazy to stray off the path. By that time, I'd forgotten this was done and things just went from there. XD

* * *

><p>Zetsu was annoyed. That damn dog had been standing there barking at him for about 3 minutes. A tick vein popped out on the back of his… mandibles…? His head, rather.<p>

"What _is_ it, you stupid dog?"

It barked and bounded around excitedly before running out of the room and back in. It kept the gesture going until Zetsu got the idea to follow finally and the two were at the basement door in the matter of about 3 gay babies.

The dog barked at the door.

"Zetsu? Are you there?"

"Kimiko…?"

"Zetsu! Listen, open the door! We're locked in!"

Zetsu shrugged and tried to pull the door open.

But it wouldn't budge.

"Zetsu?"

"Hm?"

"The door isn't opening, is it?" Kimiko asked dejectedly.

"Uh, yeah."

"Well that's just _wonderful_," Tsuneni sighed loudly.

"Use a chakra attack on it or something!" Itachi called through the door.

Zetsu concentrated his chakra into his hands, grabbed the doorknob, and pulled with all his strength.

That door refused to even creak under the pressure.

"I can't! My chakra's working, but I think there's some kind of shield…"

"We can't use our chakra in here either!"

"You guys can last until maybe I can figure out a safe place to phase through the wall, right? Then I could just get you out one by one?"

"Uh, well…" Kimiko started nervously.

"There's water leaking in here," Deidara butted in, "and it _kinda_ reached the breaker box… So… uh…"

"It's like a liquid lake of lightning," Itachi finished.

"Well that sounds bad," the dark side of Zetsu muttered.

"Oh, and Zetsu?"

"Yeah…?"

"Someone's trying to kill us."

Zetsu gave the door a curious look as though it would somehow reach whoever had said it on the other side.

"Kim got shoved in here by something; or someone."

"Yeah, I was waiting by the door and someone like, threw me in here."

"Well maybe if I could find whoever locked you in there, I could get them to lift the chakra seal."

"Zetsu; please do. You better haul ass because the water's already up to the very bottom of the first flight. It's getting claustrophobic."

"Alright then, I'll be back."

Zetsu disappeared a moment later. Rainy whimpered at the spot where Zetsu once stood and sat next to the door.

"Where's Tobi?" Tsuneni asked.

"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY," they heard through the other side of the door.

"Tobi! Tobi, are you there?"

"Yeah, Kiki-san?"

"Can you, uh… get into the basement by doing that weird… appear-suddenly-out-of-a-cloud-of-cotton-candy-smelling-smoke thing… like you always do?"

"Tobi tried that but he can't get in there. Why, are you guys having a party without Tobi?"

"No; we're just gonna be painfully electrocuted to death in here is all," Kimiko said, sweatdropping sadly and leaning against the door. To anyone who could see how she'd looked away, they'd say that the conversation was over.

"I never got to meet Snooki," Deidara sighed. Everyone knew he was a Jersey Shore fan. Not to mention, he had the biggest crush on a certain Italian oompa-loompa with big hair.

"I never got to help Leader-Sama dominate the world," Tsuneni said, sweatdropping.

"I never got to hit Justin Bieber with a bus," Kisame murmured.

"Tobi never got to meet Miranda Cosgrove," Tobi groaned through the door.

"You're not gonna die, Tobi," Sasori informed, sweatdropping.

"… Still."

"I hope your life really does flash before your eyes before you die… I wanna see _something _before I go…" Kimiko murmured. She had switched positions and wa now sitting with her forehead pressed against a post for the handrail.

"Didn't you see it when you uh… you know? Passed before?"

"No, I just heard stuff…"

"What kind of _stuff_?"

"It was… I dunno… just music… and voices…" Kimiko explained, gripping the post her head was resting against. If her blindfold were off, she would've been staring down at the water about 4 or 5 feet below in the very definition of melancholy thoughtfulness. "and… that sound the trees make right before it snows…"

"They don't make a noise before it snows," Tsuneni said with a hint of doubt in her tone, raising her head and placing her intertwined fingers around her upper kneecap as she crossed her legs.

"They do in my world," Kimiko replied almost robotically. She was long gone by now, the Akatsuki knew. Wherever that place was, she must've liked it there. She was always content with her thoughts, it seemed.

"Well what does that sound like, exactly?" Tsuneni pressed. They weren't done.

"Like… Like that sound you hear right when you turn the TV on, I guess."

MEANWHILE…

Zetsu was zipping around the hideout, following the scent of hormones and cheap perfume. He occasionally heard the shrill, giggly mating call of a fangirl. Yet he still felt like a 4 year old chasing a bird in a McDonald's parking lot. You could see it and hear it, but it was always out of reach by just a few feet.

As he was phasing through a wall, he came across an article of clothing lying on the floor. It was barely an article of clothing, but still counts as something to cover one's self.

He smelled it and immediately recognized it as the perfume he'd been catching whiffs of around the hideout. When he held it up, he found it to be a skanky, light purple crop top. It was of the button-up sort, and he could easily dismiss is for being Tsuneni's. Tsuneni hated button-up shirts because she always miss-matched the buttons. Also, the buttons almost always went missing from the strenuous activity Tsuneni often went through to be the very best Mary-Sue out there; both on and off the battlefield.

Next, he could rule it out as Konan's because of the utter level of skank it omitted. Zetsu (both dark and light sides) were sure of Konan owned it, they'd have remembered.

It obviously wasn't Kimiko's. She, although having filled out nicely for a 13 year old, was still just a kid. Konan was determined to keep her in dresses and bows and bright colors. This top would have been vetoed by anyone in the Akatsuki within eyeshot.

So… Who's was it?

He saw a flash. It wasn't bright like a car's headlights. It wasn't dark like a shadow darting across the room after too many Creepy Pasta readings. It was kinda like… a caramel sort of flash.

He spun around and there was another article of clothing on the floor. It was a pair of white nylon shorts barely long enough to be considered shorts. Maybe a bikini bottom would be a better description.

It smelled the same as the crop-top.

There was a shriek of laughter. Another flash, this time more thickly a shade of caramel.

He turned again to catch the flash, but there was now another piece of clothing on the floor. It was a frilly black bra; size 34 D.

"Sweet baby Kami," the dark Zetsu murmured.

He didn't see it. He heard it. There was a _whooshing _noise, followed by a squeaky giggle.

He was met by a blue thong dangling from the side of the coffee table nearby.

"Oh Zetsu," a high voice cooed.

He turned and almost fainted with the force of the nosebleed he got.

There stood a naked fangirl, save for a pair of purple music note clips keeping her unrealistically messy Hershey brown bangs back just above both her ears. Her breasts jiggled and shimmered in the dim light of the room, and there was the typical porno music playing somewhere in the background as sparkles and rose pedals fluttered about.

Her eyes were golden and close-set, with long, curvy eyelashes. They stood out brilliantly against her sunkissed, smooth skin.

"Aren't you gonna eat me?" she asked, pressing a slim forefinger up against her chin and winking. Zetsu's nose was still gushing.

"I'd be afraid to get some kind STD if I did," he countered somewhat coolly. His nose was still leaking, which didn't really help his case.

She took a step forward.

Oh great, she had her own jiggle sound effect…

"C'mon now; I'm chewy," she enticed seductively.

Zetsu felt an uprising in his shorts.

* * *

><p>8'D Time to update my other stories now~... Or later~... or WAAAY later~<p>

Review?


	8. Chapter 8: The basement PART 4!

You guys. Holy shithole. XDDD

I haven't updated in forever. I know that. But it's Christmas break and it was my BIRTHDAY YESTERDAAAAYYY WOOOOOOOOOOOO.

So I just wanna say that I'll hopefully be uploading a whole lot more. I have nothing to do for the next 2 or 3 weeks, so y'know. I'll be spending a lot of my time on the internet.

I also don't have Microsoft Word anymore. ;_; It was the only thing that kept my grammar and spelling in check. But I'll hopefully be getting it back on my laptop soon, so hopefully you won't have to worry about my horrible English as much.

Go ahead and read. Just... Just go. I won't hold you back any longer. 8'D

* * *

><p>Through a series of a events far too intricate and explicit to properly explain without getting sued, Zetsu managed to convince the fangirl to release his friends from the basement.<p>

"Thanks Mifuyu," the light side of Zetsu yelled after the caramel flash as she dashed from the hideout, her clothes in hand. He pulled his robe on over himself and the black side thought about how nice it was of Mifuyu to teach them how to properly draw hentai.

"I specialize in drawing genderbent Akatsuki members, and so far you're my favorite," Mifuyu had said, running a finger along Zetsu's jawline. She had a natural aversion to clothes, it seemed. She spent the entire lesson completely naked. She made him take his robe off because she said that she better connected with people when they were bare of clothes like she was. He didn't object to it; although his boner was a bit hard to hide for the first few minutes.

"Sweet girl," the lighter murmured as he placed the paper bomb onto the metal door. She'd explained that she used a simple chakra-resistence dome around the basement. She'd meant to simply kill off Tsuneni and Kimiko, but after seeing how dull the Akatsuki was without them, she agreed to set them free. She'd instructed Zetsu to place the paper bomb on the door and set it off once he was a safe distance away. The bomb would send a slight shockwave through the basement, which would deactivate the shield. It would then allow the trapped members to get out safely.

"I just hooked up a giant garden hose to flood the basement so they'd drown," she'd explained. "You can pull it out and turn the water off once you get them out. I didn't count on the electrical wiring to have a hand in their deaths too... Sorry about that. If you need me to, I'll pay for the damages. After all, I'm a very successful artist, y'know."

"Hey, you guys are getting out now," the dark side of Zetsu yelled through the door.

"Finally!" everyone yelled back in unison.

He placed the paper bomb on the door and detonated it from a safe distance.

"What the fuckin' fuck was that?" he heard Hidan yell. He smiled as he yanked the door open. Rainy came running and barking. He wanted to see his little Kimiko.

"What was that?" Hidan repeated, grateful to Zetsu for opening the door but taken aback by the explosion.

"I had to blow the door open with a paper bomb. Sorry I didn't warn you."

"Rain, Rainy," Kimiko scrambled from behind the door and latched onto Rainy's collar. "Oh my fucking Jashin, I need to pee so bad. Go, go, I don't care, just go!"

Rainy barked and dashed off down the hall to the nearest restroom, dragging Kimiko along.

"Don't reopen your stitches!" Tsuneni yelled after them.

Zetsu relayed what had happened to Tsuneni, who in turn sent Deidara and Itachi out to remove the hose and Kisame to call someone who could fix the flooding and the electrical problems.

Kakuzu was teliing Pein their current situation hunched over and in a raspy voice, as when he tried to tell Pein what had happened Tsuneni karate-kicked him in the balls and incapacitated him for several minutes.

"It's best not to tell them what happened until... y'know, they get back," was her only apology.

"Let me talk to Kimiko," Konan came on over the phone, apparently bludgeoning Pein with a pillow for it.

"She's peeing. Y'know how she is when she hears something explode," Kakuzu explained, still hunched over.

"What exploded?" Konan asked.

Tsuneni shot Kakuzu's balls a death look and Kakuzu quickly stammered out the first thing he could.

"Deidara wanted to chase away some birds on the roof."

Konan was seemingly satisfied with the explanation.

"Sasori, can you go get Kimiko?" Tsuneni asked. He nodded and ran off down the hall. He came back a moment later with Kimiko behind him.

"Hi Konan," Kimiko greeted when she was handed the phone. She'd turned off the speaker, so everyone listening stood in silence.

"... Yeah. No... Okay. Yeah... Yes ma'am. Okay. Okay... Yeah."

Kimiko tried to lean on her right foot but quickly switched back to the other. Her face faltered for a moment but no one really noticed besides Tsuneni. Kimiko had had a slight limp since she returned from her year long absense, and no matter how much they asked her or inspected the foot or leg, she claimed she was fine and even got a bit mad if someone made a fuss.

"Um... Yeah. Why?"

She listened for a good 6 seconds. Then, she burst out into such a laughing fit that she eventually fell to the floor onto her side, still clutching the phone.

"Holy... Holy God. Okay... Okay..."

Itachi and Deidara, who had arrived about halfway through her laughing fit, stared at her. Everyone stood listening.

"You should. Yeah... Yeah. Okay."

Kimiko's breath returned to normal. She was lying there on the ground, though, with everyone waiting for her to say something wrong and blow the cover.

"Deidara was chasing away birds."

Tsuneni shot Kakuzu and Sasori a look. Hidan, who'd been there to see it, gave them a look. Zetsu looked at Tsuneni. Itachi and Deidara looked at everyone, clearly baffled by all the death looks.

"No. No, I peed... No, 'member, 'cause you made me drink that tea? ... Yeah... I don't know. It took a long time... Oh. No... Yeah."

She lifted her blindfold just enough to rub one of her eyes. It was done in a moment and the blindfold was back on her eyes. But it was still weird, in the darkness, seeing just a bit of her face that they almost never saw anymore.

"It's that one that he was-... That one. No, no. No... No. He's standing right here. No. Please. Huh-uh. No."

She sat up. Konan could be heard speaking in the silence, but nothing they could really make out.

"But you just said-! ... But why? But... Yeah... You said it though!"

"'member, it's the one that... Yeah... Creed."

She took a long breath.

"_Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, maybe six feet ain't so far down_... Yeah. Tell him... Yeah."  
>She'd actually sang something! It had been awhile since they'd heard her sing. It was nice. Hidan even made a tiny noise of recognition to which Kimiko smiled to herself at. He was the one who showed her that song. (1)<p>

"Why? ... She's doing fine... Yeah. Stupid ass... Was I supposed to? ... Right now? Now? Konan, now?"

Kimiko took the phone away from her ear and listened for a moment. Tsuneni was just about to ask what was wrong, but Kimiko had already summer-salted over a few feet to where Hidan was standing. She gave his man junk a swift kick, and she managed to scurry away before he collapsed, writhing in pain.

"Did you hear it? ... She said-!... No. Alright... Yeah... Okay... Hold on."

Kimiko placed a hand over the microphone to keep Konan from hearing.

"Tsu, she wants to converse."

"Lemme see then," Tsuneni said, reaching down to get the phone. Hidan was still rolling around in pain nearby.

"Wait, I have to say bye," Kimiko told Tsuneni, squirming away and rolling into Kakuzu's legs. She paused there, and Kakuzu just stood unmoving.

"Okay, here she is. Yeah, konbanwa," she said as a final thought before she handed to phone to Tsuneni. (2)

"Hi Konan," Tsuneni greeted sweetly.

"Hey Tsuneni! How's it going over there?"

"Good. Power's still out though."

"If it doesn't turn back on, you have my permission to burn Hidan's personal possessions for warmth."

"Was on my to-do list anyway."

"Is the power out in the village?"

"It shouldn't be. I saw some lights when I looked out earlier."

"Well there's cash lying around if you wanna get take-out."

"We'll order from that place with the sexy delivery guy."

"Give him a big tip when you do."

"Yes ma'am."

"We'll be back in 2 days. So... Y'know, keep the place together until then."

"Naturally."

"You can give the phone back to Kakuzu now; Pein's been waiting."

"Okay, bye."

"Yeah, bye Tsu-Tsu."

Tsuneni handed the phone back to Kakuzu. He pulled Kimiko off the floor and pushed her in Tsuneni's direction while he walked away to continue talking with Leader-Sama.

"How'd you know about our lie about Deidara chasing away the birds?"

"... What are you talking about?"

"We lied to Konan and told her you went to pee because Deidara was chasing away birds with explosions and that's why you had to run and pee."

"... That was just a lie I came up with."

"Really?"

"Yeah... That's... a weird coincidence though," Kimiko replied slowly, shivering heavily afterwards with a disdainful look on her face.

"What's with the shiver?"

"I just hate saying 'coincidence... Only boring people use that word."

"Hey, can you guys use chakra?" Itachi asked, rubbing his sore hand. Tsuneni had diagnosed him with a jammed finger from when he punched the door, and he was trying to use some healing chakra to fix it. But it wasn't fixing.  
>Tsuneni tried to use her chakra, but it wouldn't work. It would just make her feel tired.<p>

"Mifuyu said that you'd be temporarily unable to use your chakra. It'll come back in a few hours."

"Mifuyu?"

"That fangirl that trapped you guys in the basement."

"WHY DID YOU KICK ME?" Hidan finally yelled. He was still on the floor. He tried snatch Kimiko's foot, but Tsuneni saw it coming and lifting Kimiko up by her arm at the last second.

"Konan told me to."

"WELL YOU'RE AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN," Hidan said bitterly, wiggling around trying to grab at Kimiko from where he was on the floor. Tsuneni held her up higher while the child hung limply, unaware of why she was being dangled.

"But _she said_..." Kimiko started but never really finished. She did that a lot. She would usually say something like "but you said," or "but she/he said..." without completing the sentence. The Akatsuki took it as her own style of throwing your words back in your face.

"I DON'T CARE," Hidan yelled, pushing himself up and snatching Kimiko out of Tsuneni's hands.

"Oh what the-!" Kimiko yelled as Hidan flung her down the hall. She went skidding along rather comedically with dust flying up everywhere and the dorky upbeat music playing in the background while everyone watching suddenly went chibi-style with gigantic sweatdrops forming on the back of their heads. Kimiko was lying face down in the carpet a good 30 feet down the hall.

"Dumbass," Tsuneni growled, smacking Hidan upside the head. It was hard to believe that a few minutes earlier she was about to confess something to him.

"WILL YOU GUYS SHUT UP ALREADY?" Kakuzu hollered. He continued his conversation with Leader-Sama and the other Akatsuki members looked at one another as if looking for someone to blame for the mess.

"There's gonna be a repair man for the water damage and another guy for the electrical wiring here tomorrow. Damn shame we'll have to kill them afterwards; they sounded nice," Kisame relayed to Tsuneni. She nodded and rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"Well I guess we should just order the food and go to bed afterwards," she said. Kakuzu took on ordering the food.

Everyone went about doing their own things; looking for a generator to charge their phones or wandering around because there simply wasn't anything to do. Itachi went outside to meditate. He couldn't stand having chakra for too long and he decided to speed up the process by relaxing in their zen garden outside.

Tsuneni, Sasori, and Deidara were all in a very serious conversation about how close they came that day to death, when someone's phone rang.

"I GOT A HANGOVER," sang the ringtone loudly. "WHOAAA! I'VE BEEN DRINKING TOO MUCH FOR SURE..."

Kimiko was already laughing her ass off, and Hidan was right next to her, laughing just as hard. As it turns out, someone who wished to remain anonymous had set their alarm to the wrong time and "Hangover" by Taio Cruz just happened to be their alarm tone.

"Fuckin'... Oh my God," Kimiko rasped out, her face burrowed into the carpet with her butt in the air and her arms still clutched over her stomach. Hidan was lying on his back near her with his hands covering his face.

"You two are so immature," Tsuneni said. Her and Sasori were secretly smirking, and her voice faltered a bit when her laughter threatened to escape. Deidara had clapped a hand over his mouth to contain his chuckling, and Tsuneni couldn't help but wonder if the mouths on his hands were laughing secretly too.

"What's everyone laughing about?" Tobi asked from above them. He was standing on the ceiling above the couch.

"Tobi! Did you find it?" Kimiko asked, suddenly deathly serious and in a cross-legged position on the floor. Hidan was straight-faced now as well, but he was still lying on the ground.

"Here, Mi-chan," Tobi said, jumping off the ceiling and landing a little clumsily in front of Kimiko. He pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to Kimiko, who smiled as she felt the thing in her hands.

"What is it?" Tsuneni asked.

"It's a healing stone from Hidan's village. There's a hot spring there that has these magic rocks in it. It's like a healing chakra amplifier. It only works if you can use chakra, so I thought I'd give it to you," Kimiko explained, throwing the stone to Tsuneni who paused it in mid-air with her telekinesis. She inspected it from afar for a moment before bringing it closer to grab it.

"These are expensive; how'd you get one?" she asked. She ran her fingers over it's smooth surface and noted that it was colored a greenish-blue color.

"My sensei gave it to me after I graduated to chuunin," she said. She was still smiling, but it was hollow.

"Man, these take me back," Hidan said, grabbing the stone from Tsuneni and holding it. Tsuneni blushed momentarily; Hidan had touched her hand.

"Whenever I get my chakra working again, I think I'll try it out on your head, Kim," Tsuneni said to avoid looking at Hidan, who was shirtless and standing right next to her. He was always shirtless, but this time was different.

"But that shit hurts when you use it," Kimiko replied with a pained look on her face.

"It's supposed to, dumbass. The more it hurts, the more it heals," Tsuneni shot back as she took the stone back from Hidan. The ones like this that she'd seen before were a lot larger. This one was about the size of a ping-pong ball, and it weighed about as much as a box of toothpicks; surprisingly small and light.

"This would've been useful a while ago," Sasori said, extending a hand to Tsuneni as if to ask for a look at it. She gave it to him without complaint. "How come you bring this out now?"

"I used to use it a lot, but in my chuunin exams my opponent messed up my chakra flow and it did something to my healing chakra. Made it painful to heal stuff after that so I just stopped using it."

"But I've seen you heal stuff without any problems, hm," Deidara said, nudging her with his foot. She twitched away from his foot and fell over onto her side, away from him.

"It stopped hurting so bad after a while, but I had horrible control over it as you've already seen."  
>It was true; her chakra control in general was pretty sloppy to begin with. But since she couldn't use chakra at all as of her return, it made things harder.<p>

Tsuneni's to-do list was always pretty long in her opinion, but she only had 3 things on it at that moment.

1. Burn Hidan's personal possessions in the event that they aren't able to keep warm during the night.

2. Remember the 2 years of memory she lost.

3. Help Kimiko.

* * *

><p>(1): They're referring to the song "One Last Breath" by Creed. From the context clues, I'd say Konan was asking Kimiko about the song and she had to sing some of it to show Konan what she was talking about.<br>(2): "Good evening" in Japanese.

OHMYGOD THERE WE GO. 8'D I felt incomplete without writing fanfiction every other day of the week.

If you guys have seen what happened in the most recent 2 chapters of Naruto in the real world...

GOD I'M SO DEPRESSED. WHEN I FOUND OUT I THREW MY PHONE AND WAILED WITH GRIEF AND I SOBBED GROSSLY WHILST READING THE CHAPTER ON TUMBLR AND I JUST... MY FEELS. ;_; AND THEN I READ THAT SOMETHING HORRIBLE ALSO HAPPENED IN THE CHAPTER BEFORE THAT ONE SO I HAD DOUBLE FEELS AND I JUST SOBBED MORE GROSSLY.

For those of you who haven't read these chapters or heard about them so you don't know what I'm talking about, I won't spoil it. But if you're anything like me you'll be devastated by what happens. ;_; Holy shit.

Anywho. Reviews? Inspiration? Flames for not being around? PLEASE OR I WILL SOB GROSSLY. ;_;


	9. Chapter 9: Whistle for me, baby

"Hey, Kim, you have pretty good hearing, right?" Deidara asked in a muffled voice. His chopsticks were hanging out of one side of his mouth whilst he tightened his girly ponytail with his fingers. No one wanted to admit it was girly, but they all had a mutual understanding.

"Depends on your definition," Kimiko replied. She had torn up about 5 pieces of wheat toast, and after carefully molding the pieces into little balls, she would use her chopsticks to dip them into a bowl of semi-melted butter. Since she couldn't see, they all had to wonder how the Hell she managed to arrange them into a perfect little line in front of her.

"Well, what can you hear right now, hm?"

Kimiko paused, her chopsticks held up to her lips with a wad of buttery toast in their clutches. Anyone who cared enough to hear the response all stopped chewing to listen.

They expected her to list something really creepy or profound, like "I can hear Tobi's heartbeat, and Jashin knows where that boy is in this damn hideout," or "I can hear colors now. Colors have sounds, did you all know that?" But she just sat with a stony expression on her face. It was hard to tell if she was thinking, or trying to listen. In that utter silence, lasting about 7 seconds, they didn't know what to expect.

Suddenly, though, their blind little terrorist trainee was laughing. She just burst out with a whole-hearted, hard cackle that made her drop her chopsticks. She clapped a hand over her mouth and the tension in the atmosphere from before just kind of disapated. It was replaced by light-hearted "What the living hell is wrong with you?" stares. They had little light in the room; a few flashlights pointed up to the ceiling and a candle or two. In that faint light, they saw Kimiko laughing and it was so unsettling yet wonderful at the same time.

"What's your problem?" Sasori questioned, one of his eyebrows higher than the other. He wouldn't admit that he had a smirk, but it showed through in his voice.

"You... You know those... Those farts... Where it kind of whistles at the end?" She managed, cracking up again while Deidara quickly covered his mouth again to muffle his sob of laughter. Tsuneni shot Kakuzu a look from across the room that told him she had no idea what Kimiko's problem was, and one side of Zetsu, probably the darker side, found this humorous enough that he almost choked on his slab of beef jerky.

"Kimiko, we are EATING, god fucking damnit!" Kisame snapped, biting down on his bottom lip to keep the chuckles in. If he hadn't cursed, he probably would've laughed.

"Hidan! Hidan, are you okay? That... sounded painful," Kimiko started off yelling, but her voice broke up into hard laughter towards the end.

Hidan, who went to the kitchen to get his food, poked his head into the lounge, and he was looking disapprovingly at Kimiko with the slightest hint of guilt hidden somewhere in his expression as well.

"It _did not _fucking whistle, you perverted little asscheek," he said sternly as he walked in with his stack of 3 Pizza Hut pizza slices on his napkin. Plates? No, no... No. The Akatsuki had an unspoken rule; if you can avoid using dishes, do it.

"Maybe you didn't hear it... It was kinda like a dog whistle; all high-pitched... And squeaky," she almost fell into another laughing fit, but Hidan walking by and purposefully ramming his big toe right into one of her kidneys kept the noise to a minimum. That didn't stop Itachi, Sasori, Tsuneni, and Kisame from choking on their food, or Zetsu, Deidara, and Kakuzu's cackles, though.

After a shitload of teasing Hidan and his dog whistle buttcheeks, the Akatsuki finished eating their food and tried to retire to their bedrooms for the night. But, as the universe would have it, the night was bitterly cold within the confines of their stone walls despite it being mild, early May. Kimiko had the right idea; she'd curled up on the floor in front of the lit fireplace in the lounge with a dog and a fuzzy blanket. Soon, everyone had sprawled out comfortably on the the floor nearby, mostly for the warmth, at first.

"You guys wanna tell ghost stories until someone shits their pants?" asked Hidan.

"You mean..." Kimiko began. They were all expecting it, but none of them were quite prepared. "_W__histles_ their pants?"

That was it. Everyone was done. Hidan, who was sitting on the couch, shoved his head in his hands. Kakuzu was sitting there with his widely grinning mouth clamped shut, shaking his head. Sasori and Itachi's shoulders were shuddering with unexpressed howls of laughter. Kisame, Tsuneni, and Deidara had to scramble out into the corridor and cackle into their hands to avoid giving Kimiko the satisfaction. Zetsu sat there, in his plant pot, in the corner of the room.

"Kimiko, pretty baby, sweetie, you just cured cancer," the lighter side of Zetsu said raspily. The leaves of the plant he shared the pot with were shivering with the force of his contained giggles.

"Oh my fucking god, just... Oh my god, Kimiko, shut your whore mouth," Hidan said in monotone. He couldn't even laugh. He was just done. It was so unbearably hilarious and stupid and infuriating and entertaining that he just couldn't feel anymore.

After a solid 10 minutes of the Akatsuki leaving to take walks, get drinks of water, and just silently shaking their heads at each other, shoulders still shivering with giggles, they returned to the lounge and rejoined Kimiko. Since she didn't quite understand what everyone found so utterly amusing about her comment, she'd given up on chirping "what? What's funny? What happened?" between breaks in the howls of laughter she caused. Instead of trying to comprehend the Akatsuki's ragequit, she'd curled up into a fetal position, facing the fire, with her back turned and her thoughts wandering.

"About those scary stories... I figured since we're already arranged into a circle jerk in here, all sleeping in the same place like the faggots we are, we might as well bond," Hidan explained. He was still pretty indifferent from the event earlier. He knew it would eventually hit him, though.

"Well... Did you have any stories in mind?" Itachi asked.

After 5 or 6 stories from the same 2 or 3 members, they were all a bit on edge. Tsuneni had pulled Kimiko into her lap after the second story, claiming "She looked scared," though Tsuneni was really the one who needed a comfort object. Kimiko didn't say anything to objectify, since Tsuneni clearly had a level of pride that you don't just /shatter/.

"Got anymore, anyone?" asked Itachi. He'd thrown his legs over Kisame's on the sofa they were sharing, but he was clearly doing so to have someone near him. Sasori had progressively gravitated toward Hidan on their couch, and Deidara had curled up under a pile of blankets next to Kimiko and Tsuneni.

"Remember the old man who lives down the road?" Hidan began, seeing as no one else would step forward. His story was 11 minutes long. 11 minutes of randomly shouting words to make someone twitch, or creepily drawing out his sentences to add suspense. By the end, at "and the cow they found in the attic... Was the same COW!", the last shouted word earned a manly shriek from Kakuzu, and Itachi had long ago retreated into the pile of blankets housing Kimiko, Deidara, and Tsuneni; all of which were tightly grasping one another for security.

"Wasn't _that_ scary," murmured Kisame, shrugging. Sasori nodded in agreement. For a moment, Hidan really believed that they weren't scared.

When the flashlight between the two supposed "manly men" flickered and died suddenly, they both scrambled for the pile of blankets on the floor. Zetsu, indifferent to scary stories the same way he's indifferent to diseases and parasites from the food he eats, had passed out in his flower pot. Hidan sat smugly with his legs up on the coffee table.

"Anyone wanna try to top that?"

"I have a story."

Kimiko emerged from the pile of blankets. As though she were suddenly a danger to their welfare, Tsuneni shoved the blind child out of their fear orgy and she rolled over-dramatically for a few feet before settling down under the coffee table.

"Miyu told me this one. She said that a long-ass time ago, like, last month or something, there was this guy that broke down in front of this old hotel in town, and he was like _'Awww, dude, my car!_'. So, he decided to get himself a room while the mechanic came to fix his car.

"When he got himself a room, the lady at the front desk kept on telling him, _'Sir, please, I'm gonna ask you to not look in room 201. Do not, I repeat, do not go in that room. Do not look in there, do not go near the door, do not even _think _about that room. Just... No._' That sort of thing.

"She kept on telling him that, and he was all _'Fine, god, calm down_,' and she gave him his room key. Well, his room number was 205, and 201 was just down the hall. So he was like _'Well shit, I might as well look in that room! Just to see what all the fuss is about,_' so he leant down next to the door and he looked through the key hole.

"When he looked inside, he saw a lady standing near the wall across from the door. She was wearing a white dress, and she had really long, dark hair. As soon as he looked, she started to turn around to look at him. So he backed up from the keyhole, and he decided that he should go to bed before she caught him peeping. He figured that she was a celebrity who wanted her privacy while staying in the hotel, or a member of the staff. So he didn't question it.

"When he got up the next morning, he decided to look in again. Just to like, make sure she wasn't still in the same place. So he crouched down by the keyhole and he looked inside. This time, though, all he saw on the other side of the keyhole was red. Like, deep red. He got embarassed, and he was like _'Oh fuck, she probably saw me peeping and she blocked the keyhole with something red!_' so he got up and left the hallway. Then, he dropped his key off at the front desk. Since he was leaving anyway, he decided to ask the lady at the front desk why 201 was off limits.

"After some pestering, she gave in and told him that some psycho killed his wife in room 201. Customers didn't feel comfortable in there, and they decided to stop using it. He got a little nervous, and he asked what the wife had looked like. So the front desk lady looked at him, and she said that the wife was a tall woman, with long dark hair. He was about to leave, terrified and about to shit himself, when she made one last comment. She said _'And her eyes... They were the prettiest shade of deep red_.'"

There were 4 seconds of tempered, cautious silence. The gears were grinding in the Akatsuki's heads.

"Let Uncle Hidan get in there," Hidan nervously murmured as he dove for the blanket orgy. Tsuneni grabbed onto him and pulled him inside as the other members of the Akatsuki shivered and made "Oooooohhhhh"s and "Aaaahhhh"s of recognition.

"Did that... Really happen?" asked Itachi after a moment. They heard shuffle noises as Kimiko attempted to crawl toward the pile of unsettled and twitchy Akatsuki members.

"Yeah-huh. Miyu-chan doesn't bullshit."

"You're the bullshitter here, Kim. You're bullshitting right now. That... That could never happen."

"You know what, Hidan, you just don't want to admit that creepy bullshit happens sometimes."

"Stop saying 'bullshit', you little shits," Kakuzu put in, slapping the back of Hidan's head.

"Kakuzu, don't call Kimiko a shit," Tsuneni interjected.

"You guys... 'Shit' doesn't even sound like a word anymore... Shit, shit, shit..." Kimiko trailed off. Deidara grabbed her and pulled her into the orgy of fear and bullshitting Akatsuki members under the blankets. No more scary stories were told that night. No one slept comfortably that night either. Mostly because Kimiko's whistle joke finally hit Hidan in the dead of their slumbers and he woke everyone up with his howling laughter.

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><p>WHEW. WHEEEWWWWW You guys. I'm done with 8th grade. Which means summer vacation. Which means free time. Which means I'll be spending a lot of time on the internet. Which means... YOU WILL BE SEEING A LOT OF ME. 8'D;;<p>

I'd appreciate reviews. Tell me what you wanna see. Ask me questions. Get mad at me for disappearing for like, a billion years. JUST. LIKE. TALK TO ME, YOU GUYS. LET ME KNOW YOU'RE STILL WITH ME.

Love ya, babes. Talk to you again soon. ;D


	10. Chapter 10: It's okay not to be okay

I'M GOING TO UPDATE MORE REGULARLY I PROMISE.

I've been on a bit of an angst kick today... So if things take some weird or dark turns here and there it's probably because of that. Most of this was written in snippets over the course of about 4 days so the mood changes a lot. Also, IT'S LONGER THAN NORMAL. 8'D

Okay, go and read now. We'll talk again soon.

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><p>Pein and Konan came home to find everything too... orderly.<p>

Tsuneni was calmly making dinner with Sasori and Itachi, Kisame was training out back (he was really playing with Kimiko's dog, but then again, isn't playing with a dog always a workout?) Hidan was performing his weekly rituals in his room, Kakuzu was creepily cleaning his coin collection in his room, Deidara was playing a girly little hand game with Kimiko in the lounge, Zetsu was cleaning out the freezer in the basement, and Tobi was, for once, sitting idly in the lounge, watching Deidara and Kimiko.

"It's... Peaceful in here... I don't like it," Pein said as he entered the kitchen. Tsuneni looked up from her wok, where she'd been making fried rice. Sasori, who was cutting carrots, shot Itachi a glance from across the kitchen island. Itachi threw an over-dramatically uncaring look over his shoulder. Konan, though her heart belonged to Pein, had to admit that Itachi _was_ pretty sexy.

"Did you think we'd have burned this place down by now or something?" Tsuneni asked with a raised eyebrow as she turned back around to flip the rice again. Her hair, which had by this point grown to just past her breasts, was tied back, and she was wearing purple, rather than her usual black. She wasn't even using her telekenesis to swish the wok around. She was using her delicate little hands.

"I expected us to walk in and find chaos. This isn't chaos."

"You have to learn how to trust me. I can take care of these idiots just fine."

"Let's scare everyone else and use the intercom to announce our arrival," Pein suggested, taking Konan's hand. They left the room, and Tsuneni gave Sasori and Itachi knowing looks from over her shoulder.

"Zetsu better have the basement taken care of."

"He started a while ago. I'm sure he's done, by now."

"The only thing they'll probably find out about is Kimiko's head. We haven't come up with a lie for that yet, have we?"

"Oh shit... Well, we can just tell them the truth about that part, I guess. She just fell over and an old injury reopened. That's all that happened, right?"

"WE'RE BACK, BITCHES!" Konan yelled into the intercom system. They heard Kimiko screaming down the hall from both surprise and the sudden and intense shock of such a loud noise bombarding her sensitive hearing. Hidan let out a spirited "MOTHERFUCKER" somewhere else in the hideout. Tsuneni felt a flutter of excitement in her stomach from hearing that religious freak's voice.

"Report to the meeting room now, please. You all get a special gift from Konan and I," Pein said, more gently than Konan's screeches. Tsuneni turned off the stove, and she, Sasori, and Itachi went to the meeting room. They ran into Kakuzu and Kisame in the hall, and the 3 younger members who were playing hand games in the lounge emerged a moment later. Kimiko was slung over Deidara's shoulder, hanging limply, with Tobi behind them, ocassionally jabbing an index finger into Kimiko's spine.

All Deidara could offer as explanation was an apologetic smile and a shrug.

When they'd all assembled in the meeting room, Kimiko slumped over the table in her chair, still apparently unconscious, Pein started handing out the gifts.

"So, Leader, how was your trip?" Tsuneni asked as she absent-mindedly levitated a pen a few inches off the table. Itachi attempted to push it down, with an unamused expression albeit, but to no avail.

"Well, it was a break from you bastards," Pein offered with a shrug. Although deliciously unsavory things went on between him and Konan while they had their alone time, you'd never be able to tell by his flat tone. He was arranging the bags containing the Akatsuki members' gifts into a line on the meeting table in front of him. Konan stood next to him, helping him arrange.

"We missed you too," Sasori sighed, rolling his eyes to add to the sarcasm dripping in his voice. Tsuneni had busied herself with poking the unconscious Kimiko with her pen, which he was lazily gazing upon like he'd just made no comment towards their leader.

Pein ignored Sasori's sarcasm and handed the first of their gifts to Itachi. Konan passed Kisame's and Kakuzu's gifts to them, and they worked their way around the table. When Konan placed Kimiko's gift in front of her, the slight rustle that the sack gave startled Kimiko into a sitting position.

"Oh, you're awake," Konan smiled as though the child had just woken up from a nap, rather than coming out of what could've quite possibly been a coma of some sort.

"Why do you have to yell?" Kimiko finally managed after about 15 seconds of gaining her bearings on her surroundings.

"Because I care," Konan assured, lifting Kimiko out of her chair and hugging her as if she were a giant stuffed bear. The child didn't put up much of a struggle. She simply hung there, a chibi rain cloud over her head while Konan blissfully rubbed her face against hers.

"She's way too attached to that crazy little bat," Hidan mumbled, tearing the bag off of his gift.

"Here, open this," Konan told Kimiko, setting her back into her chair and setting her gift in her lap. It was apparently a box in a plastic bag. Kimiko over-exaggeratedly ran her hands over her gift, pausing when she seemingly realized what it was.

"No. No, Konan, you didn't."

"I did."

Kimiko tore the sack off, and pulled out what was in fact a series of tinier, colorful boxes, all taped together. She tore a box away from the stack and ripped the top open. After giving a long 6 second inhale, she grabbed another box and did the same thing. They seemingly had different contents, but she knew that by the weight and size of each box. Finally, after inspecting 3 of the 6 tiny packages, she gave a shriek of happiness and leapt up to give Konan a hug.

"THANK YOU, THANK YOU, OH MY JASHIN THANK YOU!"

"What the fuck did you buy her?" Hidan asked as he set aside his gift; an assortment of colored bandages to wrap around the handle of his scythe. He secretly appreciated the gift, but he'd never admit that.

"They're just special candies from the village we visited."

"THEY ARE MORE THAN JUST CANDY, AND OH MY JASHIN THANK YOU SO MUCH," Kimiko practically sobbed into Konan's chest. Konan gave a sweatdrop and patted the child's back with a humored smile.

Sasori was given a special neurotoxin for his poison collection, Kakuzu got a 400 year old coin that was stolen from a mueseum (Kimiko made a crack about how "Kakuzu, I bet you're still older than that coin" and she almost got a boot to the face), Kisame got special mineral-filled fish food for his girlfriend, Tobi got a box of glowsticks, Itachi got a set of "manly, Akatsuki colored" nail polish, Deidara got a package of special fireworks, Zetsu got a special meat cleaver with a hooked edge, and Tsuneni was gifted with a book, filled with healing techniques.

When the gifts were given, and gratitude was voiced, Pein and Konan went about checking for any holes in the story of what went on after they left.

"The power came back on afer a little while. Just a passing storm, I guess."

"Yeah, we ordered food and went to bed, and we went to Walmart yesterday to get stuff. That's about it."

The rest of the Akatuski nodded their agreements at Tsuneni and Kakuzu's explanation. They didn't _want_ to lie to their leader and Konan, but they were already too far in to dig themselves out.

Might as well cover up what happened as best they could, they all thought.

They thought that the two had been thoroughly convinced of what happened, when Konan decided to lay a hand on the back of Kimiko's head. Tsuneni forgot to place fresh bandaging on the stitches, and Kimiko, trying as best she could to hide both the shock of pain and surprise that coursed through her, straightened and took a sharp breath of air. Itachi grabbed Tsuneni's knee under the table. Kisame shot Kakuzu a look, while Kakuzu himself was more concerned about his bruised jewels and what Tsuneni would do to them if this lie faltered.

"Care to tell me why there are stitches in my baby Kim's head?" Konan asked, looking around at the slightly guilty faces of each of the members.

"I was walking to the bathroom and I fell, and I kinda bumped the back of my head on the floor," Kimiko got out as she wiggled around to loosen her tensed muscles.

"Yeah, I stitched it up myself. It looked like it was just an old injury that didn't heal properly. Trauma like that on an injury could reopen it," Tsuneni jumped at the chance to explain right after Kimiko, feeling Itachi's grip on her knee lessen.

"Old injury, huh?" Pein asked, sneaking behind Kimiko and grabbing the back of her neck to hold her still. She gave a cry of surprise. He inspected the injury while the rest of the Akatsuki held their breath.

"You did a good job there, Tsuneni."

The collective exhale from the rest of the group caused a slight draft in the room.

"I've been using healing chakra to speed up the process a little, but I don't wanna do anything too intensive. It might leave a bigger scar if it heals right away."

Pein nodded his agreement and let go of Kimiko's neck.

"I thought you were gonna murder me or something," Kimiko commented with disturbing complacence, placing a hand over the spot where Pein's hand rested.

"I'm keeping you around because you're a valuable tax deduction," Pein said as he ruffled her already messy hair, careful to avoid the stitches.

The Akatsuki disassembled to carry about their normal agenda. Pein stopped Tsuneni outside of the meeting room and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"We were wrong about your leadership skills, Tsuneni. Looks like you handled them pretty well."

Tsuneni gave a smirk of satisfaction. She hadn't been an ex-Anbu Black Ops captain for nothing.

"Hey, Tsuneni, this isn't... Yours, is it?" Konan asked as she emerged from the doorway of the meeting room. In her hand was a frilly bra.

Holy fuck, Tsuneni thought as the rest of her mind went blank. Mifuyu apparently didn't pick up after herself when she left.

"It sure as hell isn't Kimiko's. You sure it isn't yours, Konan?" Pein put in while Tsuneni tried to summon an explanation from her ass. Konan checked the size in the back.

"I mean, it's totally my size, but I don't usually wear this kind."

"You should start."

"I'll be right back," Tsuneni interjected while the two lovers were distracted. She dashed into the lounge and grabbed Kakuzu by the back of the Akatsuki cloak before dragging him into the closet nearest the door.

"They found a bra."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"They found that damn fangirl's bra lying around and I don't know how to talk my way out of this one."

"say it's yours."

"I'm going to say something that your balls will meet their end with if it leaves this closet, but I have tiny boobs. This bra is Konan's size."

"Say it's Konan's."

"She doesn't wear those kind."

"Well she should start."

"You're a perverted man."

"Aren't we all?"

"What should I tell them, damnit!?"

"KIMIKO!"

Kakuzu swung the closet door open and hit Kimiko square in the face. She just happened to be walking by the closet to get to the entrance to the lounge when Kakuzu heard her footsteps.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" Kimiko screamed, flying backwards. Blood from her possibly broken nose went spurting everywhere.

"Deidara, clean that up," Tsuneni ordered to the bewildered and mildly horrifed Deidara, who'd been standing there the entire time. Deidara nodded slowly as Tsuneni snatched the writhing Kimiko off the floor and pulled her into the closet with her.

"They found the fangirl's bra," Kakuzu informed Kimiko despite the child being nearly unresponsive. Blood was gushing from her nose, though she tried to stifle it with her hands.

"Wha-? What are you-?!" She was clearly confused and frightened, but Kakuzu gave her a comedically dramatic slap across the face and she stopped stammering.

"That fangirl left her bra in the meeting room and Pein found it. What do you suggest we do?"

"To not hit the anemic 14 year old in the face with a goddamn door!" Kimiko yelled, her voice muffled by her hands and the blood still gushing from her nose.

"I mean about the bra, you little idiot!"

"Did you try telling him.. it's Konan's?"

"Yeah, it was frilly. She doens't wear that kind," Tsuneni threw in before Kakuzu could beat her to it.

"Well she should-!" Kimiko began before Tsuneni rammed her knee up to hit the poor child in the small of her back. She gave a cry of pain that echoed in the confines of the closet.

"We should get Itachi. We can look around for the other clothes so they don't get suspicious," Tsuneni suggested, oblivous of Kimiko's suffering as she talked to Kakuzu over the younger member's head.

"You, blind girl! Listen, I'm sorry I had to break some of your beautiful face, but we need you to distract Pein and Konan until we can find all the clothes Mifuyu left and get them out of here," Kakuzu said to Kimiko, placing hands on both her shoulders. His words had a calming effect, and she stopped whimpering and squirming.

"Sasori, did you hear us in there?" Tsuneni asked as she emerged with Kimiko and Kakuzu a moment later. Sasori, who had also witnessed the scene from the beginning, nodded. Deidara was crouching on the floor, using a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and some paper towels to scrub the blood splatters off the carpet. He and Tsuneni made eye contact, and though she tried to offer an apologetic look, he promptly looked away and sweatdropped nervously, cleaning faster.

"Should I take her to Leader and Konan, then?" He asked, taking hold of Kimiko's raised forearm so she knew who to follow. She had blood dripping off her arms and soaking the front of her shirt. Deidara leapt into action and placed a paper towel under her before they could further stain the carpet.

"Yeah, try to give us some time."

"What should I do if they ask about the bra?"

"You guys I'm gonna pass out," Kimiko urged, leaning into Sasori to stay on her feet. Anemia was a bitch.

"Okay, okay, um, pretend you don't know anything about it until we figure something out," Tsuneni said as she let go of Kimiko and rushed out of the room with Kakuzu behind her. Sasori picked Kimiko up, bridal style, and carried her off to the entrance near the meeting room, where the sexual tension between Konan and Pein was mounting.

"Should I be dramatic?" Kimiko asked in a whisper. Sasori almost nodded, but he remembered that she wouldn't see it.

"Yeah, cry or something. We gotta give them time to get the clothes out."

Kimiko nodded and made her troubled breathing more pronounced.

"Leader, I accidently doored Kimiko and I think she broke her nose," Sasori said to get their attention. Kimiko was dramatically whimpering and sobbing painfully into her bloody hands.

"Damnit, you two... Alright, let me see," Pein scolded before attempting to gently pry Kimiko's hands away from her face.

Meanwhile, Itachi, Tsuneni, and Kakuzu were running around trying to find the remaining articles of clothing. From what they got out of Zetsu, Mifuyu had a bra, panties, a pair of shorts, and a crop top for them to find. Tsuneni found the shorts almost immediately, and debated keeping them for herself before shaking her head vigorously and discarding them. Itachi found the top, and since he's Itachi and he's perfect, he discarded them without a second thought of keeping it for his own sick entertainent, no matter how nice it smelled. After searching for 4 more minutes, though, they found no trace of the panties, though.

"Well, we looked in all the obvious places, so she either took them with her, or they're still somewhere in here," Tsuneni hypothesized as they met outside the Junior members corridor of the bedrooms. Since Kimiko's absence, they decided to move the seniors in their partnerships to one hall, and the juniors to the other hall. By "they", the seniors all agreed that they wanted a seperate hall because they were tired of the younger members always making too much noise at night and expecting them to be quiet until the younger partners woke up, usually, at the earliest, late morning or early afternoon.

"If we looked in all the obvious places, even if it's still here, I don't think Pein or Konan would be able to find it either."

"Kakuzu, that logic is lazy and unsafe. But I agree."

They heard a choked, girly scream from down the hall, followed by a slightly less girly, but still really shrill, scream a few seconds later.

Tsuneni shook her head. Kakuzu cringed. Itachi sighed.

"I bet they tried to set her nose back in place and she kicked someone in the balls."

"You beat me to it."

"I heard someone get kicked in the balls. Did I miss it?" Hidan asked excitedly as he came running from his room. He was shirtless, and he looked revitalized. His ritual was completed.

"Pein and Konan found that fangirl's bra in the meeting room, so we had to break Kimiko's nose as a distraction while we got rid of the other clothes. Pretty sure Pein just tried to set her nose back in place and got kicked in the balls."

"You broke the bat's nose? Nice. With what?"

"Kakuzu slammed a door in her face."

"Is that her blood on your foot?" Hidan asked, pointing to Kakuzu's blood-stained socks.

"Aw, what the shit? I liked these socks."

Konan came out of the meeting room down the corridor a moment later with Kimiko. She had a large white bandage secured across the bridge of her nose, and Tsuneni was sure that if she wasn't wearing her blindfold, they'd see the area around her eyes bruising. There was still blood all down the front of her shirt, on her face, and covering her hands.

"Tsuneni, could you clean up Kimiko while I help Pein?"

"I bet he tried to set her nose and she kicked him in the balls," Tsuneni said with a humored smirk, taking Kimiko's hand from Konan. She didn't mind the semi-fresh blood that made Kimiko's hand slippery.

"Hehe, yeah. I told him to let me do it, so he can't say I didn't warn him."

"I didn't mean to," Kimiko offered, blushing heavily and sweatdropping.

"Careful, she's wobbly," Konan threw over her shoulder as she went in to help Pein. Sasori, who'd been standing in the doorway with an uncomfortable smile, stood closer to Tsuneni so they could talk more quietly.

"I think I convinced Konan that the bra was one of hers. I don't know; I suggested that it was and she just didn't remember, and she didn't say anything else about it."

"That's good... We couldn't find the panties, but we found the shorts and the crop top," Tsuneni murmured as she led Kimiko forward. Sasori followed closely, so they wouldn't be overheard. Kakuzu, Itachi, and Hidan were all still standing at the entrance to the Junior hall.

"Let me carry you; it'll be faster," Sasori offered to Kimiko, who was indeed off balance from the blood loss. Kimiko obliged, and allowed Sasori to carry her bridal style to avoid getting her blood smeared anywhere on himself.

"So there's just a pair of whore panties lying around here somewhere?" Sasori asked once Kimiko had settled in his arms. Hidan went about pestering the blind little thing, trailing behind them and occassionally poking her by reaching around Sasori. She kicked him right before they got to her room, and he laughed, backing off.

"Well we looked in all the obvious places, so maybe they won't find it if they aren't going out of their way," Itachi offered as he appeared in Kimiko's doorway with Kakuzu. They all entered and locked the door.

"Yeah, maybe. What did you do with the clothes?"

"Threw them away. It's not like we need them. Plus I'm not inviting her back to get them," Tsuneni explained, dragging Kimiko into her closet and closing the door behind them.

"They smelled good," Itachi mentioned in passing. "Not that I'm into fangirls. It's just that they always smell nicer than your average girl, y'know?"

"I hate to say I agree with you," Hidan replied, leaning his back against the door.

"You guys are disgusting," Tsuneni commented from the other side of the closet door. They heard a bump and a spirited groan of pain from Kimiko immediately following.

"Sorry, sorry, are you okay?"

"... I... I don't know yet..."

"What are you guys doing in there?"

"I slammed her face into the door when I was getting her shirt off. Oh my God, are you sure you're okay?"

They heard a thump, a dull scraping sound, and another small thud before the muffled scream came.

"Shh, calm down, calm down, you're okay, you're okay, I'm sorry!"

More muffled screams of pain.

"She's screaming into her hands; I'm not trying to strangle her, I swear!" Tsuneni yelled through the door. There was another series of thumps, Tsuneni making interjections for Kimiko to stop whatever she was doing, and finally, the closet door swung open with Tsuneni falling out of it, face first onto the carpet. Kimiko, with a fresh t-shirt messily pulled on over her slight frame, lied in the fetal position on the floor inside the closet, still screaming into her hands.

"We still have to wash your face off," Tsuneni yelled as she crawled back into the closet and pried Kimiko's hands away from her mouth.

"Don't touch me, DON'T TOUCH ME!"

"Damnit I said I was sorry! Hey, calm down, you're gonna irritate your stitches!"

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU, WAAAAAAAAHHHH," Kimiko screamed over Tsuneni's words. Her voice quivered with the wave of pain that one only experiences when they break a part of their face.

"You're being a bratty little bitch, y'know that!?" Tsuneni yelled back, restraining Kimiko's arms at the side of her head, her knees pressing into either side of the child's ribs.

Kimiko, who was right in the middle of another scream, paused. She stopped screaming, struggling, fighting... She just froze. Tsuneni felt all of the child's strength fall away and she stayed still.

"Did you kill her?" Hidan asked, peering into the closet.

"Okay."

"Okay what?" Tsuneni asked.

"Okay, I'll go."

"Alright, geez, don't scream at me like that. It was an accident-!"

When Tsuneni tried to pull Kimiko up, the child moved away. She crawled a little ways backwards and stood up on her own.

"No, not you."

"Huh?"

"Not with you," Kimiko repeated. She didn't sound like she meant it in a mean way; she sounded like she was... Well, not _scared_ of Tsuneni, but she sounded uncomfortable.

"What do you-?!"

Kimiko dodged past Tsuneni's advance and weaved around her, as though she didn't have a protective blindfold over her unseeing eyes. It was unusual.

"Fine, fine. Whatver. Deidara, you wash her up," Tsuneni finally decided, seeing as Kimiko was suddenly so... Wary, of her. Deidara, who was let into the room when Tsuneni tumbled out of the closet, stepped forward.

"Alright, let's go, 'Mi," Deidara said, reaching into the walk-in closet and snatching Kimiko's shoulder. She flinched, but complied and hurriedly exited the room with blond terrorist. Hidan, for some unknown reason, followed them.

"What did you do?" Kakuzu asked. Tsuneni shrugged after a moment and stared at Kimiko's bloody t-shirt, which she held out about a foot in front of her using her telekenisis.

"I... I don't know. She just froze up and then she got all weird..."

"She doesn't get insulted when you call her a bitch anymore... Did you say something else?" Itachi asked. Kimiko's pets, Shadow, Rainy, and Ghost were all sitting on her bed, watching the exchange with that look of quiet knowing that only animals can wear so naturally.

"Whatever, she's always doing creepy stuff like that," Kakuzu dismissed, waving them off and leaving the room. Sasori offered a shrug to Tsuneni, and together, they all left the room. They ran into Kisame and Zetsu at the front of the hall, and she handed the shirt to Zetsu, who's back was to them as they were coming down the hall.

"Do whatever you want with that."

"Who's... Who's blood is this?"

"Kimiko's. She broke her nose."

"Oh, is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine."

Tsuneni walked on to catch up with Kakuzu, Sasori, aned Itachi. Zetsu turned the shirt over in his hands and resisted the urge to creepily stick his face right in the center of the bloodstain to get a big whiff. Kisame gave the shirt a look of disgust and shrugged when Zetsu looked up at him quizzically.

"Tsuneni? Can you come here for a second?"

It was Pein who'd called to her, from the meeting room doorway.

"Sasori, can you finish cooking the fried rice for me?" Tsuneni called to Sasori. He gave her a thumbs up over his shoulder before continuing his walk with Itachi and Kakuzu to the kitchen.

"We were interrupted last time. Sorry about that. Look, you did a good job of keeping these guys from burning the place down."

She thought, for a second, that Pein knew something about what happened with Kimiko just now, but she let a relieved smile pass over her face. Gratitude.

"Yeah, don't worry about it. It was nothing I couldn't handle."

Pein smiled at her, and he was about to ask her something, when, as expected in the Akatsuki household, all hell broke loose simultaneously.

Tobi had apparently figured out a way to knock out the power, and he was now crawling around on the ceiling of the halls and corridors, chucking glowsticks everywhere and blaring "Who You Are" by Jessie J on his phone. This startled everyone, and everything else happened at once.

Sasori managed to splash hot oil and frying rice everywhere in the kitchen, which scared Itachi, who was cutting vegetables. He managed to fling his knife backwards, and it pinned Kakuzu to the wall. When he hit the wall, he accidently knocked over a chair. When Itachi tried to turn around, he tripped on the chair and sideways on the butt-shelf part of the chair, hitting his hip against it.

In the bathroom, Deidara tripped over the bathroom rug and fell face first into the ground at the moment the lights went out. Kimiko, startled by the sudden flourish of noise and movement, stood up, forgetting that she had a bowl of water in her lap. The water splashed against Deidara, and he threw the wet towel he was holding over the back of his head as he tried to roll away from the water splashing on his back.

The towel hit Hidan in the face, and he let out a confused "WHAT THE HELL" as he stumbled backwards. He stepped on Rainy's tail, who'd been sitting outside the bathroom, paitently waiting for his master. He yelped, and the sound scared Kimiko enough to make her forget Deidara was in front of her. She tripped over him and staggered. When she accidently stepped on the back of his knee while trying to regain her bearings, he yelled and jerked his leg away. This caused her to totally lose her balance, and she fell face-first into the ground.

While this was going on, Hidan managed to get the towel off his face. He stepped forward, into the bathroom, not realizing Kimiko was on the floor. He stepped on the back of her left shoulder, and she screamed. She struggled against his foot, and he tripped because of the sudden movement beneath him. He landed on top of Deidara, and he accidently hit Kimiko in the face with his foot. It slammed right into the side of her cheekbone, and when her head twisted to the side from the force of the impact, she slammed the other side of her face into the cabinet under the sink.

"What's going on?" Konan asked, stumbling out of the meeting room and bumping into Pein. He didn't notice her at first, though. He'd just facepalmed so hard that the sound of the slap echoed in the confines of the hideout's stone walls.

"_SEEING IS DECIEVING, DREAMING IS BELIEVING, IT'S OKAY NOT TO BE OKAAAAAAYYYY_..." Jessie J sang as Tobi clambered about on the ceiling, still dropping glowsticks.

"IT'S OKAY NOT TO BE OKAAAAAAYYYY," they heard Kimiko repeat in a pained scream from down the hall.

"I'm going to kill myself one of these days," Pein murmured, rubbing his temples. Tsuneni, though she couldn't see a thing except for the glowsticks illuminating parts of the floor, planted a comforting hand on Pein's shoulder. It was all she could do to keep from laughing.

* * *

><p>I just remembered why I love writing this story so much. XD<p>

If you haven't already, go listen to "Who You Are" by Jessie J. It's a nice song, I swear.

Anywho, I'd just LOVE it if you guys would review. Go check out the polls I have going. PM me. I'm having a lonely, rainy, cold summer so far over here, and I want you guys to share your beautiful happiness with me. XD

Alright, I'll be working on the next chapter now. Expect an update in the near future. Maybe. I dunno, my internet's been crappy lately.


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